static files, updated readme

This commit is contained in:
ad044 2021-03-24 18:08:37 +04:00
parent 71b984d3d2
commit 037f510650
677 changed files with 16433 additions and 11 deletions

3
.gitignore vendored
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@ -23,10 +23,11 @@ yarn-debug.log*
yarn-error.log*
src/static/sprites/*
src/static/media_images/*
src/static/media/*
!src/static/media/webvtt
src/static/voice/*
src/static/sfx/*
!src/static/sfx/index.ts
scripts/extract/discs
scripts/extract/*.log

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@ -14,7 +14,7 @@ Building locally is currently not possible. This is because the repository lacks
## Code strutcure
- **/src/**
- **src/**
- **/\_\_tests\_\_/** - Jest tests.
- **/components/** - TSX components used in the actual 3D environment (sprites, meshes, etc.).
@ -29,7 +29,7 @@ Building locally is currently not possible. This is because the repository lacks
- **/utils/** - Utility functions.
- **store.ts** - Zustand store used for managing global state.
- **/scripts/**
- **scripts/**
- **/extract/** - WIP extraction script to automate the local building process of the game.
@ -37,6 +37,14 @@ Building locally is currently not possible. This is because the repository lacks
Once you've saved the game manually (going into pause => selecting Save), look inside the `localStorage` of your browser and copy the value of the key `lainSaveState`. Changing that value and calling Load Game from the main menu will load that save state. Keep in mind manually modifying the JSON and loading it might lead to some funny bugs since the dependency graph of the game progress is not linear.
## TODO
- **Finish writing the extraction script**
- **Improve/complete the translation**
- **Implement an interface for changing languages**
- **Allow the player to modify the keybindings**
- **Implement a better way of exporting/importing save files**
## Screenshots
<p align="center">
@ -50,14 +58,6 @@ Once you've saved the game manually (going into pause => selecting Save), look i
<img src="markdown/8.png" width="49%">
</p>
## TODO
- **Finish writing the extraction script**
- **Improve/complete the translation**
- **Implement an interface for changing languages**
- **Allow the player to modify the keybindings**
- **Implement a better way of exporting/importing save files**
## Reporting bugs/Contributing
If you have any ideas/suggestions/found an issue or want to help us with the translation or anything else, please submit an issue or join our [Discord server](https://discord.com/invite/W22Ga2R).

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.guide-paragraph {
text-align: left;
font-size: 1.5em;
color: white;
display: block;
padding: 2em;
}

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src/static/css/header.css Normal file
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.header {
display: block;
margin: 0 auto;
margin-top: 2em;
text-align: center;
}
.header a {
display: inline-block;
}
.header a:not(:first-child) {
margin-left: 1em;
}

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@ -0,0 +1,36 @@
.header-paragraph,
.credits {
display: block;
margin-top: 2em;
text-align: center;
color: white;
font-size: 1.5em;
}
.header-paragraph a,
.faq a,
.credits a {
font-size: 1em;
display: inline;
font-family: unset;
}
.cool-text {
color: #ffa531;
}
.faq {
display: block;
margin: 0 auto;
padding-left: 5em;
padding-right: 5em;
text-align: left;
font-size: 1.5em;
color: white;
}
.mainpage-header {
text-align: center;
font-size: 2.5em;
color: white;
}

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.main-table {
font-size: 1.5em;
width: 95%;
color: white;
margin-left: auto;
margin-right: auto;
border-collapse: separate;
border-spacing: 0 2em;
}
.main-table h3 {
text-align: center;
}
@media (min-width: 1900px) {
.main-table {
padding: 0 calc(100% / 4) 0 calc(100% / 4);
}
}
.main-table tr td:first-child {
width: 20%;
text-align: center;
vertical-align: middle;
}
.main-table tr td:nth-child(2) {
padding-left: 1em;
text-align: right;
vertical-align: middle;
}
.main-table p {
text-align: initial;
}
.control-table {
margin: 0 auto;
border: 1px solid white;
padding: 1em;
}
.control-table tr td {
text-align: left;
}
.control-table tr td:first-child {
width: 50%;
text-align: center;
vertical-align: middle;
}
.control-table tr td:nth-child(2) {
padding-left: 1em;
text-align: center;
vertical-align: middle;
}
.webgl-anchor {
text-align: unset;
font-size: unset;
font-weight: unset;
display: unset;
font-family: unset;
}
.browser-notes {
border: 1px solid white;
padding: 1em;
}

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body,
html {
width: 100%;
height: 100%;
background: black;
margin: 0;
}
.game {
border: 1px solid white;
position: absolute;
top: 50%;
left: 50%;
transform: translate(-50%, -50%);
overflow: hidden;
font-family: Arial, serif;
touch-action: none;
}
canvas {
pointer-events: none;
position: relative;
z-index: 1;
}
video {
height: 100% !important;
position: absolute;
z-index: -1;
}
a {
text-align: center;
font-size: 2em;
display: block;
text-decoration: none;
color: #ffa531;
font-family: "Courier New", serif;
font-weight: bold;
}
a:hover {
text-decoration: underline;
}
#subtitle-container {
width: 100% !important;
height: 100% !important;
position: absolute;
z-index: 10;
pointer-events: none;
justify-content: center;
display: flex;
}
#subtitle {
text-shadow: 3px 0 0 #000, -3px 0 0 #000, 0 3px 0 #000, 0 -3px 0 #000,
1px 1px #000, -1px -1px 0 #000, 1px -1px 0 #000, -1px 1px 0 #000;
text-align: center;
color: white;
align-self: flex-end;
font-size: 2rem;
}
.text-center {
text-align: center;
display: block;
}

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WEBVTT
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So... Mrs. Iwakura, please wait here in the waiting room.
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Lain, you dont have to worry so much.
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Please sit down there.
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Ah... do you want some juice or something else to drink?
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Its OK if you dont worry so much.
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Let's see.
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I'm thirsty, so I'm going for tea... mind to follow me?
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Because it will look funny if only I drink it.
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Thank you.
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Which one should it be?
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We have many to choose from.
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The same as you.
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Black tea?
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Got it.
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Just a moment...
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You can put the sugar and milk in it if you want.
00:48.650 --> 00:49.960
Here you go.
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I guess it's good.
00:56.100 --> 01:00.850
Earl Grey tea, I really love it.
01:01.320 --> 01:02.410
Earl Grey?
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Right.
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Even with tea there are lots of kinds, with different smell and taste.
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Does it taste good?
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Well...
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It suits my taste.
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But I'm not sure about you Lain.
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If you want to, you can drink a little bit.
01:19.970 --> 01:23.040
If its not to your taste, I can make something else for you.
01:23.440 --> 01:25.730
Here...

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WEBVTT
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That smells good.
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Here you go.
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How is it?
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Looks as if you dont like it, huh?
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Too bitter?
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What if you add some sugar?
00:14.760 --> 00:16.600
Well, how about if you add some milk?
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It might take away the bitterness.
00:19.280 --> 00:21.100
Or I can get you something else?
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I dont like milk.
00:23.720 --> 00:31.440
Ah, sorry. I didnt know... Well, how about if I get some juice for you?
00:34.120 --> 00:35.020
Im sorry...
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Thats all right; I probably couldnt have had tea either at your age.
00:43.040 --> 00:46.700
I said that there are lots of different kinds of tea right?
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If I dont like it, I dont like it.
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Of course, that doesnt mean I cant drink it, but different kinds of tea have different flavors right?
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What do you like, Lain?
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Why dont you like milk?
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It upsets my stomach.
01:06.040 --> 01:11.100
Ha, ha, truth be told, when I was a child I had the same problem.
01:11.100 --> 01:17.840
Especially when the school lunch included milk, I can drink milk now though.
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I cant drink it, but I really love it...
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How about milk? Would that be all right?
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Whats it called?
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I forgot what its called, but its milk that doesnt upset your stomach.
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It's for kids like you Lain, who are like me as a kid and cant drink milk.
01:34.880 --> 01:39.320
If you talk about it with your mother, Im sure shell look for it for you.

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WEBVTT
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Are there different kinds of milk as well?
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Thats right; although theyre basically all they same, depending on how theyre prepared there are different kinds.
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Different kinds?
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Yes, in tea too.
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Depending on the way the leaves are picked and the way the tea is brewed, the same leaves can be very different.
00:18.970 --> 00:19.860
People too?
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Hmm?
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Are there different kinds of people as well?
00:24.570 --> 00:29.960
Hmm, well, rather than kinds, each person is different in his or her own way.
00:30.660 --> 00:35.960
For example, you dont like tea, but there are also people like me who love it.
00:36.720 --> 00:40.940
There are also people whose stomach gets upset when they drink milk, but there also those whose stomach doesnt get upset right?
00:42.090 --> 00:47.340
However, there also people who when they grow up, learn to drink it.
00:48.300 --> 00:52.930
Lain, youll probably will learn to drink tea you know.
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Its not a good thing, nor a bad thing.
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Its normal that there are different kinds of people.
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Thats why you can just ignore rather you should be proud of your uniqueness I think!
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Be proud of it?
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Im sorry... Thats right, you worry, dont you?
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You dont have to boast about it, but theres no need to mind what other people think is what I meant to say.
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I have weird dreams, is that different too?
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You may think its different, but in fact thats normal.
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If youre worried about that, I might be able to help.
01:39.420 --> 01:45.480
Not to help you stop having those dreams, but rather helping you to explain things you dont understand.
01:45.480 --> 01:48.610
If you come to me with your problems, Id be really happy.
01:49.500 --> 01:55.500
You know, Ive studied a lot to help you answer those kinds of questions; Im still studying actually.
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If youre ever in trouble or something, I'd be glad if you could come and talk with me.
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Id like to know more about you Lain.
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Would that be OK?
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Im so glad!
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Starting today you and I are friends!
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Please come and play sometime!
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Promise?
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Id like to ask you things as well!
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You can ask me anything you want.
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If I dont know the answer Ill look up the answer for you.
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Ill even prepare your favorite drink.
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Whats that??
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Milk that doesnt upset your stomach!

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WEBVTT
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8th of July, 2pm, 2nd session
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Come on in.
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Touko, Touko, hello.
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Hello, Lain
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Hello.
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Its almost the summer holidays! Are you looking forward to them?
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Not especially.
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Lets see here, today, today Id like to play a game with you Lain, thats why I brought this.
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Whats that?
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Its oil painting set. Do you like to paint Lain?
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I dont like paintings... Maybe...
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I see... Well, do you know tic-tac-toe?
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I know it, but I dont want to play that
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I... Im sorry. Well, do you have anything you want to do Lain?
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Id like to talk some more.
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What do you want to talk about?
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Whatever. About you.
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About me? Well... Im not that interesting you know.
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Yes, you are.
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No really, Im not that interesting.
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But look, Im already 27, if we talked about me wed have to start all the way at the beginning and itd take forever!
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And really, its not a very interesting story at that.
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What kind of doctor are you?
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What kind of doctor you ask?
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Well, I help people like you who worry about certain things, and listen to their stories.
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And I give them advice to help fix their problems.
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You understand?
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Ah... I thought so
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Whats wrong?
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If youre not feeling well, or youre not comfortable please tell me, you can be honest with me.
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I should be more careful really.
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You shouldnt worry so much.
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Just relax, come and have a nice talk with me once a month.
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Okay...

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WEBVTT
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So, hows school?
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Normal.
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By normal you mean? Not interesting, not boring, just normal?
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Yes...
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How about friends?
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I have friends.
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Do you often play with them?
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Yes, but everyones busy with cram school. The only place I go is here...
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Dont you want to learn something? Calligraphy, or take swimming lesso... ooohhh...
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Its ok; dont worry about it.
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Im sorry... I'm far from a good counselor.
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Id rather stay at home than go out and do something.
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What do you do at home?
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Thats a secret.
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Aw, thats mean. You wont tell me.
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But Im ashamed.
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Are you doing things youre ashamed of?
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Maybe...
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Now I want to know! Ah, so be it... But Id really like to know...
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Do I have to tell you?
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Id be glad if you did tell me.
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I talk to my stuffed animals.
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I just thought it was a...
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You thought?
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Ha, ha, never mind! I used to have a stuffed animal I loved...
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What kind of stuffed animal?
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A dragon I got at the bank. Weird huh?
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Why is that weird?
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Well, arent girls supposed to play with cute stuffed animals?
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It wasnt even a stuffed animal... it was a piggy bank dragon.
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But I still treasured it.
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I called it Tacchan and talked to it all the time.
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Me too. I talk to my animals. Is that normal?
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Thats normal! Do I look weird to you??
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No...
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Youre the same as me, Lain, were not weird at all!

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WEBVTT
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Hello Lain, have you been well?
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Yes, and you?
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Yes, Ive been fine. Im a bit tired though.
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Tired?
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Yes, Ive been pretty busy.
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How busy?
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Hmm, well... At least talking with you like this is something I can look forward to.
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Really?
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Really! What shall we talk about today... What do you want to talk about Lain?
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We couldn't talk that much about you last month.
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Id rather talk about you, Lain; not about myself, though.
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But youre right, its only fair that we both get to talk about what we want, so this time well talk about me, but next time well talk about you Lain, is that all right?
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OK!
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Im not sure where I should start though... My name is Younera Touko, Im 27, Im a doctor at the Tokyo Research Institute for Psychotherapy... That's all about me.
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Ah, we wont get anywhere like this.
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You know, Im used to listening people talk, not used to talking myself.
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Is there anything youd like to know Lain?
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How did you become a doctor?
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I studied a lot at a place called a university.
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I wrote something called a thesis, and with that I received my degree to become a doctor.

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WEBVTT
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But, what kind of study do you like?
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What is college like?
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Youre in junior high school now arent you, Lain?
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So if youre in junior high and want to keep studying, you go to high school, right?
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College is where people go if they want to keep studying after high school.
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Do you like to study, Sensei?
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I didnt used to.
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But I went to America as an exchange student when I was in junior high school, and I started to feel differently then.
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You were an exchange student. Wow!
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At the time, I just went because my parents wanted me to.
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But people have different ways of seeing things in other countries, and I learned a lot from that.
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Looking back, it was a lot of work, and at first, I was very nervous, but now Im really grateful that I was able to be an exchange student.
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I learned English, too.
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Thats amazing, Toko Sensei!
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Oh, its not so amazing.
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There are lots of people who have studied much more than I have.
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Im really a pretty lazy person.
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I liked to fool around, really.
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Its boring to just study, isnt it?
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Do you like to study, Lain?
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Not really.
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What subjects dont you like?
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Japanese and physical education.
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I see. So you dont like exercise.
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No, I dont like physical education.
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You like exercise, then?
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Yes.
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What kind of exercise do you like?
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The metal beam.
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Wow!
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I used to like running, but I was never good at the metal beam.
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I would spin around and get too dizzy.
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I like to spin around.
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Both frontwards and backwards?
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Yes, both.
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What dont you like?
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You dont have to answer if you dont want to.
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I'm sorry.
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Are you tired?
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Why don't we end early today?

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WEBVTT
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Im sorry about last time... but Im relieved.
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I was worried that you didnt like me and wouldn't come anymore.
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...Im sorry.
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Theres no reason to apologize.
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I was the one who asked you a bad question.
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Can you forgive me?
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...thank you.
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So I thought we could work with this today. Can we talk about this?
00:31.410 --> 00:34.050
They had that at the last hospital.
00:34.740 --> 00:38.240
Really? I wanted to play with this.
00:39.060 --> 00:40.930
That's some kind of test, isn't it?
00:41.380 --> 00:44.290
Amazing Lain! Do you know about it?
00:44.800 --> 00:48.210
They call this a Rorschach Test.
00:49.120 --> 00:52.280
This isnt really a test.
00:52.850 --> 00:55.440
Think of it as a game.
00:56.090 --> 00:57.810
But thats boring.
00:58.020 --> 00:59.960
Hmm... I guess so.
01:00.400 --> 01:02.810
If you think it's boring, we'll stop the test.
01:03.140 --> 01:04.330
Hows that?
01:04.960 --> 01:05.680
Okay.
01:06.180 --> 01:09.040
Okay. What do you see?
01:09.400 --> 01:10.340
A splotch.
01:10.660 --> 01:12.600
Um, right.
01:13.140 --> 01:15.400
But does it look like anything?
01:15.860 --> 01:17.800
What do you see?
01:18.100 --> 01:23.340
Me? Hmm... a persons face, I think.
01:23.770 --> 01:26.570
Is it angry? Is it also crying?
01:26.880 --> 01:28.520
It looks a little angry.
01:29.480 --> 01:30.530
This is boring.
01:31.020 --> 01:32.400
Lain...
01:33.170 --> 01:37.780
Right. A promise is a promise. Lets stop.

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WEBVTT
00:00.930 --> 00:06.900
Do you want to talk about something fun? Do you like to take a bath or a shower?
00:07.410 --> 00:08.460
I like showers.
00:08.760 --> 00:09.660
Really?
00:10.060 --> 00:15.440
I prefer baths, but I dont get a chance to take them much at home.
00:15.440 --> 00:18.180
Its a bit of a hassle to prepare for a bath, too.
00:18.600 --> 00:28.000
I usually take showers, but I take a bath on my days off.
00:28.980 --> 00:33.330
Dont you like the way a bath feels?
00:33.850 --> 00:35.400
Im afraid of being in hot water.
00:35.880 --> 00:37.260
Are you afraid of drowning?
00:37.700 --> 00:38.610
No.
00:38.840 --> 00:40.770
Then, what are you afraid of?
00:41.080 --> 00:46.010
Im not really sure. It feels like Im being touched all over by something.
00:46.220 --> 00:50.500
Hmm... the water does touch the skin.

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WEBVTT
00:00.740 --> 00:03.100
Its because Im weird...
00:03.450 --> 00:04.860
Wait a second Lain.
00:05.600 --> 00:08.240
Youre not a weird kid at all.
00:08.740 --> 00:18.820
If you're a kid with an active imagination, you're gonna have that kind of experience where you see human eyes in the patterns of a wooden ceiling.
00:19.120 --> 00:20.480
But that's not the case.
00:21.360 --> 00:25.240
Do you dislike being different from others?
00:25.940 --> 00:27.280
Im not sure.
00:27.480 --> 00:28.320
Okay?
00:28.720 --> 00:30.920
Lain is Lain because she is different.
00:31.690 --> 00:37.200
You have a very strong imagination, and thats a good thing.
00:37.560 --> 00:40.330
So dont say that you're weird.
00:41.320 --> 00:43.760
I dont think that at all.
00:44.130 --> 00:46.050
But... the test...
00:47.080 --> 00:54.880
Im sorry, but... yeah, youre troubled, right?
00:55.370 --> 00:59.890
I want to make sure you're not troubled.
01:00.380 --> 01:03.860
In order to help you, I have to know more about you.
01:05.180 --> 01:07.140
I dont want you to do anything you dislike.
01:08.060 --> 01:12.900
I'll do anything I can to help you solve your problems. You're the only one who can truly understand yourself right?
01:13.800 --> 01:16.580
Nobody can understand Lain except Lain, right?
01:17.360 --> 01:19.760
Only you can solve your own problems.
01:21.380 --> 01:25.660
For me to be able to help you, I need your cooperation.
01:26.600 --> 01:28.690
What should I do?
01:28.980 --> 01:31.120
Right now you don't need to do anything.
01:31.650 --> 01:40.820
Since you and I are friends, if we keep talking, Ill slowly start to understand more and more about you.
01:41.450 --> 01:51.160
Then, sometimes I'll say "You might want to try this." and if you think "That sounds nice, okay.", let's try it out...
01:51.820 --> 01:56.860
So right now, itd be best if you tell me all about yourself.
01:57.770 --> 02:00.760
You wont tell anyone?
02:01.000 --> 02:04.760
Nope, itll be our secret.
02:05.240 --> 02:07.730
Not even my friends, or my mother?
02:07.960 --> 02:13.090
I promise. If I lie, one thousand needles!
02:13.720 --> 02:14.970
One thousand needles?
02:15.260 --> 02:17.860
Dont kids your age know that?
02:18.660 --> 02:26.520
When I was a kid, whenever we made a promise, we said, "If I break the promise, I will drink 1000 needles."
02:26.930 --> 02:27.770
Wouldnt that hurt?
02:27.770 --> 02:37.740
A lot!... Right! How many needles are in my stomach right now? Miss Iwakura?... I was made to drink them 5 times.
02:38.200 --> 02:39.100
...five thousand?
02:39.100 --> 02:44.610
Wrong! Yesterday, since I went to the bathroom and flushed everything out, theres zero!
02:44.930 --> 02:48.420
Sensei, that's gross!...

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:00.000
What would you like?
00:00.200 --> 00:01.770
Hello, Lain.
00:02.280 --> 00:03.380
(in a soft voice) Hello.
00:04.060 --> 00:04.820
Hmm.
00:05.180 --> 00:07.050
You dont sound so energetic.
00:07.580 --> 00:09.410
Maybe you dont feel up for this.
00:11.460 --> 00:13.570
Why dont we quit now?
00:13.570 --> 00:14.170
Ok?
00:15.900 --> 00:18.930
But since you came all the way out here, how would you like a cup of tea or something?
00:21.860 --> 00:23.490
Dont be shy.
00:25.560 --> 00:35.530
I want to talk.
00:35.740 --> 00:37.780
You dont have to force yourself. That might make you feel even worse. Take my word for it.
00:35.740 --> 00:37.780
I want to be cured.
00:38.460 --> 00:42.250
Cured...but youre not sick, Lain.
00:42.520 --> 00:44.250
But this is a hospital isnt it?
00:44.580 --> 00:51.090
Well, this place can function as a hospital, but I see patients at my research room as well.
00:51.620 --> 00:55.100
Right now, I dont know if you are really sick or not.
00:55.970 --> 00:59.780
My hunch is that you are probably not sick, Lain.
01:00.690 --> 01:06.640
Still, if you arent feeling well or are worried about something, Id like to be able to help you.
01:07.250 --> 01:09.960
Im not sick?
01:10.440 --> 01:15.010
Right now, Im not completely sure, but youre probably just fine.
01:15.850 --> 01:19.780
Even if you are sick, Ill make sure that you are cured.
01:19.920 --> 01:20.890
Youre absolutely sure you can cure me?
01:20.890 --> 01:23.840
Absolutely. I will not let you be sick.
01:24.320 --> 01:30.180
Sensei, why are you so kind to me? Is it because it is your job?
01:30.760 --> 01:34.340
Hmm... Youre right that this is a part of my work.
01:34.940 --> 01:40.320
But its a type of work thats hard to see as just work.
01:41.200 --> 01:47.170
Most of the time, I see patients, diagnose them as objectively as possible, and give them psychological treatment, but it isnt enough to make them better.
01:48.370 --> 01:51.890
Im a researcher as well as a doctor.
01:52.340 --> 01:56.570
If I see someone suffering, I must try and help that person.
01:56.770 --> 01:59.930
I want to do everything I can to help that person.
02:00.440 --> 02:02.490
You would do that for anybody?
02:03.210 --> 02:12.240
To be specific, if I see someone suffering from something for which the cause is physical and obvious, I refer that person to a specialist.
02:12.680 --> 02:17.460
If there is a car accident or a poisoning, that's what I would do.
02:18.170 --> 02:26.100
Do put it simply, Im not the kind of doctor who treats people who have something wrong with them physically.
02:26.320 --> 02:27.460
So I have...
02:27.930 --> 02:36.880
I cant tell for sure without doing a close examination, but I know that you had an examination before you came here and that no problems were found.
02:38.120 --> 02:44.180
And just by talking to you here, Lain, you dont seem to have anything wrong with you at all.
02:45.000 --> 02:53.480
But I have to have you talk to me and tell me much more about whats going on with you I cant really help you with whats bothering you.

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WEBVTT
00:00.660 --> 00:12.720
What bothers me is that I have nightmares, I see strange things, I feel that someone is touching me when no one is there.
00:13.450 --> 00:15.820
I have symptoms of schizophrenia.
00:16.000 --> 00:20.400
Schizophrenia? Where did you hear a word like that? Who said that to you?
00:20.640 --> 00:21.940
I looked it up in a book.
00:22.660 --> 00:33.280
Lain, its a good things to study hard, but its dangerous to go digging around and diagnosing yourself when you arent sick.
00:33.560 --> 00:36.980
Have you heard the expression "a lot of how sick you feel depends on what you think about it?"
00:37.210 --> 00:39.090
Actually I havent.
00:39.520 --> 00:40.760
Oh?
00:41.220 --> 00:47.140
Anyway, if you start diagnosing yourself, youre going to start believing that you have all sorts of things wrong with you.
00:48.420 --> 00:53.040
But I wanted to know whats wrong with me. I wanted to understand.
00:54.320 --> 00:55.300
I see.
00:55.490 --> 00:56.660
I understand.
00:57.400 --> 00:59.260
I think youre intentions are right.
01:00.890 --> 01:03.220
But Id like to ask something of you.
01:04.000 --> 01:11.890
Please dont go around imagining and concocting... searching, for things that you think are wrong with you.
01:12.100 --> 01:13.210
Can I ask that of you?
01:13.480 --> 01:15.140
Then will you help me find whats wrong?
01:15.140 --> 01:16.320
Of course I will.
01:17.320 --> 01:19.000
So lets make a promise.
01:19.700 --> 01:22.570
I will tell you everything I understand about you.
01:22.860 --> 01:24.780
I wont hide anything from you.
01:25.400 --> 01:27.970
If you lie can I cut off your finger?
01:28.130 --> 01:32.860
Hmm... you can do something even worse. You can hammer a nail into my head.
01:33.180 --> 01:34.410
Youre goofy, Sensei.
01:34.410 --> 01:41.250
Seriously, though, I really want to help you.
01:42.490 --> 01:47.050
Im an only child, and I always wished I had a younger sister—someone like you, Lain.
01:47.730 --> 01:50.130
Youre my big sister then?
01:50.400 --> 01:53.290
Id be happy if you saw it that way.
01:53.290 --> 01:54.050
I will.
01:54.500 --> 02:00.760
Thank you. Anyway, lets end for today. Youre tired arent you?
02:01.360 --> 02:04.570
Uh, uh. But Ill do what you asked me to do, Sensei.
02:04.770 --> 02:10.290
Great! Hee, hee. Actually, Im the one whos tired.
02:10.880 --> 02:13.290
Youre tired of me?
02:13.290 --> 02:15.060
No, no! I dont think that.
02:15.060 --> 02:17.260
Ive had a lot of other work to do today, too.
02:17.780 --> 02:20.740
I like you and Ill miss you until we meet again, Lain.
02:21.120 --> 02:22.000
That makes me feel better.
02:22.000 --> 02:26.260
Lets end now, then. Its getting late and we dont want your mother to worry.
02:27.600 --> 02:29.240
Goodbye, Toko Sensei.
02:29.540 --> 02:31.000
Goodbye, Lain-chan.
02:31.250 --> 02:35.420
Just call me Lain. Its a bit weird for a "big sister" to call me Lain-chan.
02:35.900 --> 02:40.500
Ok then, goodbye, Lain.
02:40.940 --> 02:41.890
Goodbye.

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WEBVTT
00:00.330 --> 00:01.720
Hello, Toko-san.
00:02.100 --> 00:03.450
Hello, Lain.
00:04.090 --> 00:07.050
Ok, from today were going to really tackle whats bothering you, Lain-chan.
00:07.200 --> 00:08.330
Im sorry.
00:08.330 --> 00:09.340
I mean Lain.
00:09.340 --> 00:12.500
Were going to try to figure things out so you dont see nightmares anymore.
00:12.770 --> 00:17.680
Uh, huh. I havent seen nightmares much lately, though. Sometimes I hear things, though.
00:17.680 --> 00:19.960
Hear things? Like what?
00:20.200 --> 00:21.290
I dont know.
00:21.760 --> 00:23.170
It sounds like someone talking.
00:23.900 --> 00:26.620
I dont like hearing it, so I try my best to ignore it.
00:26.980 --> 00:31.000
Hmm. Do you know whose voice you hear?
00:31.410 --> 00:36.170
I dont know. It can be a mans voice or a womans voice.
00:36.620 --> 00:39.930
Where do the voices seem to come from?
00:40.420 --> 00:41.130
From the sky.
00:41.300 --> 00:44.940
The sky? From what part of the sky?
00:45.580 --> 00:49.220
From the electric lines. Somehow...
00:49.410 --> 00:56.020
The electric lines... Do you know whats in side of electric lines?
00:56.760 --> 00:59.860
Wiring that carries electricity.
01:00.060 --> 01:06.640
Right. They carry electricity that comes from power plants. Do feel like you sense electricity?
01:07.220 --> 01:13.820
I don't really know. Sometimes it seems to come from the sky; not the electric lines.
01:14.170 --> 01:16.650
Are you bothered by it right now?
01:17.420 --> 01:21.640
No. Im not scared now. But...
01:21.960 --> 01:26.240
When you told your mother, did she tell you not to tell anyone else about these things?
01:26.880 --> 01:27.460
Uh huh.
01:27.730 --> 01:32.460
People who dont hear these things would think strange things about you if you told them, huh?
01:33.260 --> 01:35.780
You dont have to worry about telling me anything you want to.
01:36.250 --> 01:37.370
You dont have to worry, Ok?
01:37.540 --> 01:40.060
Im not going to think strange things about you.
01:40.700 --> 01:41.730
Because Im sick?
01:41.880 --> 01:49.040
No, Lain. Lets see. You know about "kanashibari?"
01:49.600 --> 01:52.450
When a ghost comes out and you cant move your body?
01:52.660 --> 01:55.120
Right. Have you ever had that happen to you?
01:55.540 --> 01:56.700
Many times.
01:56.880 --> 01:57.970
It was frightening, wasnt it?
01:58.300 --> 01:58.890
Uh, huh.
01:59.080 --> 02:00.780
Do you know why kanashibari happens?
02:01.120 --> 02:02.100
Why?
02:02.580 --> 02:04.340
The human body is very mysterious.
02:04.850 --> 02:13.080
When youre sleeping, there are times when your mind is awake, times when your body is awake.
02:13.450 --> 02:14.090
Do you understand?
02:14.770 --> 02:15.890
Sort of...
02:16.130 --> 02:20.570
Well, thats good enough for now. What parts of you are awake right now?
02:21.080 --> 02:22.360
My body and my mind.
02:22.530 --> 02:23.060
Hmm.
02:23.820 --> 02:29.100
Suppose I said something really scary right now and you feel scared enough to run out of this room.
02:29.770 --> 02:30.440
What would you do?
02:31.080 --> 02:32.290
I think I would run out of this room.
02:32.520 --> 02:33.020
Ok.
02:33.500 --> 02:36.090
Suppose that you feel so scared that you want to run out of this room, but your body is asleep and you cant move.
02:36.760 --> 02:38.060
Thats what kanashibari is.
02:39.160 --> 02:45.400
So if youre having a nightmare but your body is asleep and you cant move, you are having kanashibari.
02:46.130 --> 02:46.780
You see?
02:47.280 --> 02:49.220
If you know whats involved, its not so scary, is it?
02:49.660 --> 02:51.380
No. It isnt.

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@ -0,0 +1,196 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.760 --> 00:06.850
There are many people who have had experienced kanashibari, but we dont call them "sick."
00:07.850 --> 00:08.740
But...
00:09.050 --> 00:13.500
Hmm... there might be only a few people who have experienced what you have.
00:14.140 --> 00:16.930
Still, I dont think you should be called "sick" just because of your experiences.
00:17.780 --> 00:22.260
A lot of things can happen to a person while shes young and impressionable.
00:22.970 --> 00:26.850
But Im scared and I hate this.
00:28.010 --> 00:30.020
What are the scariest parts of your dreams?
00:30.570 --> 00:35.340
I start to feel that I dont need myself. I feel that I am an unneeded thing.
00:35.720 --> 00:37.170
You "dont need" yourself?
00:37.620 --> 00:42.170
I feel that I am being told to come back because Im unneeded.
00:43.180 --> 00:45.160
Come back? Come back where?
00:45.340 --> 00:46.480
To myself.
00:47.080 --> 00:54.340
Hmm. This is hard to understand. You want you to come back to yourself?
00:54.820 --> 01:04.010
I dont know. But it feels as if there was another myself, touching my body, ripping it apart
01:04.330 --> 01:05.420
(interrupting) And its painful?
01:05.600 --> 01:09.350
It isnt painful, but its frightening.
01:10.520 --> 01:13.570
I see. Does this happen when youre asleep?
01:14.010 --> 01:14.760
Probably.
01:14.760 --> 01:17.760
Probably? This happens sometimes when youre not dreaming?
01:18.330 --> 01:19.260
I don't know.
01:19.880 --> 01:24.290
Sometimes it happens when Im just sitting by myself, and sometimes when Im talking to my friends.
01:24.500 --> 01:29.650
Tell me what happens when youre not alone. This happens when youre just having conversations?
01:30.360 --> 01:34.170
Yes. While Im just talking, it suddenly...
01:34.680 --> 01:38.200
How do you notice it? Do your friends call out to you?
01:38.820 --> 01:40.160
Suddenly...
01:40.300 --> 01:42.800
Is there something that triggers it?
01:43.420 --> 01:46.540
I was afraid, and I felt better after staying motionless for a while.
01:47.520 --> 01:53.130
Can you explain what it felt like, or what you saw? Could you draw a picture?
01:53.940 --> 01:56.480
No, I cant.
01:57.720 --> 02:00.820
I see... Oh!
02:01.490 --> 02:02.880
We have to end.
02:02.880 --> 02:04.330
Im sorry, Lain.
02:04.330 --> 02:06.760
I have to go out and take care of some things today.
02:07.290 --> 02:09.680
Im sorry to have to stop right in the middle of a conversation.
02:10.440 --> 02:14.060
But its good for now that you cant see these things.
02:15.060 --> 02:17.940
I think that what you experience is probably similar to sleep paralysis.
02:18.040 --> 02:20.580
Ill do some research on it until next month.
02:20.900 --> 02:22.840
Thatll be my homework.
02:23.800 --> 02:27.160
Your homework will be keeping a diary.
02:27.620 --> 02:28.490
A diary?
02:28.780 --> 02:33.060
I want you to write about the things you did during the day, and what you thought about.
02:33.620 --> 02:36.140
You dont have to show it to me.
02:36.280 --> 02:37.250
Just write what you want.
02:38.050 --> 02:41.170
I used to keep a diary when I was your age.
02:41.840 --> 02:42.490
But...
02:42.490 --> 02:43.060
You don't want to?
02:43.730 --> 02:46.560
It can be really interesting to look back on the things you write in your diary.
02:46.580 --> 02:50.370
We can be forgetful, so it can help you remember things, too.
02:50.940 --> 02:52.330
That will cure me?
02:52.860 --> 02:53.770
Hmm.
02:53.770 --> 02:56.360
That probably doesnt have anything to do with it.
02:56.590 --> 02:58.620
At least it's good for you.
02:59.950 --> 03:01.840
Ill explain more carefully next month.
03:02.640 --> 03:04.600
I dont mind if you dont want to keep a diary.
03:05.490 --> 03:07.870
I went and bought you a diary book, though.
03:09.030 --> 03:09.600
See?
03:09.850 --> 03:11.120
Its cute, isnt it?
03:11.860 --> 03:16.680
I found it when I went shopping last week, and I thought it would be a nice present for you.
03:17.020 --> 03:17.890
Thank you.
03:17.890 --> 03:21.330
But dont force yourself.
03:21.680 --> 03:24.450
You don't have to keep a diary just because I bought you one.
03:24.770 --> 03:27.810
Feel free to write in the diary if you want to, though.
03:28.960 --> 03:30.400
Well I guess well wrap it up, then.
03:30.860 --> 03:32.360
Make sure youre not forgetting anything.
03:32.760 --> 03:34.530
Ill walk out to the gate with you.

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WEBVTT
00:00.850 --> 00:02.610
How are you feeling, Lain?
00:03.460 --> 00:07.720
Im doing ok. How about you, Toko-san?
00:07.880 --> 00:14.880
Pretty much as always. I could use a little more time to calm down and think things over, though.
00:15.690 --> 00:16.800
Youre very busy?
00:16.960 --> 00:24.690
Yes... Ha, ha. Now our roles are reversed. I feel like you are counseling me.
00:24.900 --> 00:25.530
Ha, ha
00:25.530 --> 00:30.820
Ha, ha. By the way, what did you decide to do about the diary?
00:31.620 --> 00:33.900
I decided to keep a diary.
00:33.900 --> 00:39.480
Wow, thats great! I didnt waste my money right before payday.
00:39.930 --> 00:41.130
Ill pay you for the diary.
00:41.130 --> 00:42.920
Im joking, Im joking.
00:43.540 --> 00:46.160
But I get paid well anyway.
00:46.850 --> 00:50.060
But I guess it's too low considering how many hours I work a day.
00:50.920 --> 00:51.980
Oh, no.
00:51.980 --> 00:52.810
This isnt good.
00:52.810 --> 00:54.460
I'm just grumbling about myself.
00:54.770 --> 00:58.130
But youre funny, Sensei. Youre a lot of fun.
00:58.130 --> 00:58.620
Ha, ha.
00:59.650 --> 01:01.300
Well, why dont we begin?
01:02.400 --> 01:04.340
Lets pick up where we left off last time.
01:05.040 --> 01:08.090
Have you learned the word "ego" at school?
01:08.530 --> 01:15.020
Uh huh. I looked into it. Its about knowing that you are yourself?
01:15.380 --> 01:16.010
Right.
01:16.610 --> 01:21.080
People around your age can get unsure about that.
01:22.180 --> 01:32.340
They ask themselves "what kind of person am I?" Boys sometimes think that they are heroes and that they will accomplish some superhuman feat someday.
01:32.770 --> 01:36.900
Girls sometimes imagine that they don't belong with their own families.
01:37.130 --> 01:43.330
They think instead that they are members of a rich elite family, and that a prince on a white steed will come one day to take them away.
01:43.450 --> 01:45.050
Kids your age sometimes believe these things for real.
01:45.840 --> 01:50.260
I dont feel that way. I think that Im just me.
01:50.860 --> 01:56.400
But Its hard to tell what you are just by yourself, isnt it?
01:57.280 --> 02:05.010
When I was younger, I thought that there was a different me, and that somehow I wasn't the person I was at the time.
02:05.280 --> 02:06.380
A different me?
02:06.520 --> 02:07.380
Yes.
02:07.780 --> 02:15.720
For example, if there was something happening that I didnt like, I wondered why I had to be the one dealing with it.
02:16.220 --> 02:20.020
I thought there had to be some kind of mistake.
02:20.680 --> 02:25.010
I thought that someday I would return to the real me.
02:25.740 --> 02:31.320
I also thought things like, if there was a big earthquake, everyone would die, but I would be the only survivor.
02:32.140 --> 02:35.020
I thought that I was someone special; someone "chosen." In another words, I believed in a "me" that could not be.
02:35.180 --> 02:36.480
Its funny, isnt it?
02:36.970 --> 02:41.560
I dont believe that Im anyone chosen. Im ok with being ordinary.

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WEBVTT
00:00.440 --> 00:01.250
I see.
00:01.700 --> 00:04.840
Thats probably because you are a strong person.
00:05.300 --> 00:11.440
I think I was probably weak and that I was trying to run away because of it.
00:11.900 --> 00:14.570
Do you think Im trying to run away from myself?
00:15.100 --> 00:20.090
I dont think so. But you want to change yourself, dont you?
00:20.810 --> 00:24.420
I just dont want to see any more bad dreams. I think that's how i feel.
00:26.010 --> 00:31.060
Could it be that you dont want to be the person who sees the bad dreams?
00:31.280 --> 00:33.260
Maybe you feel that way somewhere deep inside yourself?
00:33.480 --> 00:38.410
Could it be that you are subconsciously trying to construct a "me" that isnt "me"?
00:39.180 --> 00:41.560
What should I do?
00:41.880 --> 00:47.000
Do you think you can accept your dreams?
00:47.880 --> 00:48.900
Accept?
00:48.900 --> 00:49.540
Right.
00:50.220 --> 00:57.820
I mean facing the "you" that you dont want to meet or hear, and then trying to become friends with them.
00:59.020 --> 00:59.970
I cant.
01:00.620 --> 01:03.160
I think that all you have to do is listen to the voices.
01:03.660 --> 01:06.300
See what they are saying and see what they want to do.
01:07.250 --> 01:10.460
Face them until you understand them and expose them.
01:11.020 --> 01:13.210
Im scared.
01:13.920 --> 01:16.800
But youve made it so far.
01:17.260 --> 01:18.930
Youre still you.
01:19.610 --> 01:24.980
Youve never had a ghost punch you or had a voice act violently with you, right?
01:25.680 --> 01:29.130
Maybe these ghosts and voices are trying to be friends with you.
01:30.100 --> 01:30.850
Ha, ha.
01:30.850 --> 01:32.560
If you dont see the ghosts again, great.
01:32.760 --> 01:37.210
But I if you do see them, I think that its important that you have a good attitude and know how to brace yourself.
01:37.970 --> 01:41.250
If the ghosts show up, just shake it off your shoulders and say, "oh, here they are again."
01:41.930 --> 01:44.130
Im leaving. Im going home.
01:44.400 --> 01:47.640
Why? Did I say something I shouldnt have?
01:48.250 --> 01:54.700
I didnt lie to you. I didnt see any ghosts or phantoms. Youre a big jerk!
01:55.610 --> 01:56.560
Lain!

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WEBVTT
00:00.450 --> 00:03.140
Im sorry maam.
00:03.140 --> 00:05.340
I can handle it from here.
00:05.340 --> 00:10.900
(pause) Lain, Im sorry.
00:11.410 --> 00:15.440
I thought that if I didn't do this, your would never see me again.
00:16.530 --> 00:19.940
I just wanted to apologize.
00:20.860 --> 00:23.170
I think I was arrogant about my assumptions about you.
00:24.120 --> 00:28.290
Still, I wanted you to understand and to be comfortable.
00:29.210 --> 00:37.300
I just thought that if you could face your dreams and understand where they were coming from, that they would stop.
00:37.680 --> 00:39.220
Im sorry, Toko-san.
00:39.220 --> 00:39.780
Why?
00:40.360 --> 00:47.280
I lied to you... I didnt keep the diary.
00:48.440 --> 00:55.160
Thats ok. I told you that it was all up to you.
00:55.770 --> 00:59.090
You were trying to be helpful to me.
01:00.970 --> 01:09.720
Thank you. Im grateful that you feel that way. Can you forgive me, Lain?
01:10.460 --> 01:11.140
Yes.
01:12.700 --> 01:16.120
Im so glad.
01:17.730 --> 01:21.660
I was so sad when you walked away from our session.
01:21.660 --> 01:23.090
I cried.
01:24.090 --> 01:25.340
I felt so bad.
01:26.090 --> 01:27.560
I though you didnt like me anymore.
01:28.930 --> 01:31.060
Toko-san, dont cry.
01:31.200 --> 01:38.440
Oh.. Its so silly of me to cry over this. Im sorry, Lain.
01:39.180 --> 01:40.490
Dont cry.
01:41.380 --> 01:47.600
These are tears of joy, Lain. Im so glad.
01:49.060 --> 01:50.250
Joy?
01:50.700 --> 01:53.000
Yes. Tears of joy.
01:53.690 --> 01:58.410
Im really happy, too. I feel so close to you.

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WEBVTT
00:00.770 --> 00:03.330
Lets skip counseling today and just relax instead.
00:04.280 --> 00:05.260
You came all the way out here.
00:05.260 --> 00:05.980
Do you want something to drink?
00:06.730 --> 00:09.840
I cried so much that Im thirsty.
00:10.600 --> 00:15.930
Toko-san, Ill start keeping my diary. Honestly, this time.
00:16.490 --> 00:20.290
Dont force yourself. Youre a kind girl.
00:20.850 --> 00:22.280
Im not forcing myself.
00:22.970 --> 00:24.120
The diary is for me, after all.
00:25.340 --> 00:30.130
And the next time I hear the voices, Ill listen to see what they are saying.
00:30.900 --> 00:33.980
Then, Ill tell you what they said, Toko-san.
00:35.380 --> 00:36.620
Thank you, Lain.
00:37.410 --> 00:42.120
Happy birthday, by the way, Toko-san.
00:42.600 --> 00:46.170
Huh! My birthday?
00:46.560 --> 00:49.560
I made this for you with my mom.
00:49.970 --> 00:54.240
Really? Im so happy! Can I open it?
00:54.650 --> 00:55.280
Sure.
00:57.720 --> 01:04.610
Cookies! Good timing. We were actually out of teacakes. Let's have them together.
01:06.290 --> 01:07.000
Is it good?
01:07.320 --> 01:11.450
Mmm. It tastes like tea.
01:12.020 --> 01:14.820
You said that you like tea, so we made the cookies that way.
01:16.090 --> 01:20.660
Thank you. But then we better have a different kind of tea.
01:21.220 --> 01:22.450
It wont go with black tea?
01:22.450 --> 01:27.740
No, not that it wouldnt go with it, but it would be too bad if would couldnt enjoy the tea and cookies as much as possible.
01:28.140 --> 01:30.100
Should I have made cookies with a different flavor?
01:30.650 --> 01:31.920
Oh, no, no.
01:31.920 --> 01:32.530
Not at all!
01:32.780 --> 01:38.770
But you took all the trouble to make such nice cookies, and I want to enjoy them as much as possible.
01:39.340 --> 01:40.460
Thats all.
01:41.210 --> 01:41.920
Really?
01:42.060 --> 01:45.850
Really. Thanks so much, Lain.
01:46.920 --> 01:49.280
Sensei, it hurts.

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WEBVTT
00:00.320 --> 00:01.610
Hello, Lain.
00:02.310 --> 00:07.440
I write in my diary everyday. Sometimes I dont have much to write, though.
00:07.440 --> 00:08.370
Dont worry about it.
00:08.370 --> 00:10.150
If you force yourself youll just want to give up.
00:10.640 --> 00:15.100
I don't know how many diaries I've had that I couldn't stick to for long.
00:16.640 --> 00:18.540
Have you seen any of them since then?
00:19.030 --> 00:20.320
Ive been ok.
00:20.320 --> 00:27.110
Really? Thats good. Theres something I want to confirm with you today.
00:27.890 --> 00:28.870
What?
00:29.560 --> 00:32.440
You have really good eyesight, dont you, Lain?
00:32.880 --> 00:34.140
Really good?
00:34.140 --> 00:38.720
Youve had eye exams at school, havent you? Whats your score?
00:40.160 --> 00:41.420
One-point-five.
00:42.160 --> 00:45.210
Your eyesight is really even better than that, isnt it?
00:46.390 --> 00:49.480
But I wanted to have the same score as all the other kids.
00:49.480 --> 00:51.990
Well theres no point to having the examination then.
00:52.700 --> 00:55.550
At the last hospital you used to go to, they examined your eyes, too.
00:56.140 --> 00:58.450
But they did it differently than at your school.
00:58.450 --> 01:01.440
They had a machine that measures eyesight automatically.
01:03.080 --> 01:09.240
The machine only measures as far as three-point-zero, and your score was three-point-zero.
01:10.380 --> 01:13.770
There are some kids with extremely good eyesight.
01:13.770 --> 01:19.770
The doctor in charge of your eye-exam spoke with a cancer specialist, who said he saw no problems.
01:20.620 --> 01:21.770
Oh.
01:22.090 --> 01:26.100
Lain, what can you see outside the window?
01:27.310 --> 01:30.800
Trees and a gate to the research center in the distance.
01:31.240 --> 01:32.680
And beyond that?
01:33.250 --> 01:33.960
Buildings.
01:33.960 --> 01:35.240
And beyond that?
01:35.550 --> 01:36.550
Mountains.
01:36.550 --> 01:37.790
And beyond that?
01:38.320 --> 01:39.320
I cant see anything further.
01:39.460 --> 01:40.360
Nothing at all?
01:40.870 --> 01:43.940
A purplish color that looks like a curtain.
01:44.610 --> 01:45.730
Thank you.
01:46.550 --> 01:49.880
Im sorry to pepper you with all these questions.
01:51.330 --> 01:56.960
I think that you probably see the world in a different way than I do.
01:58.720 --> 02:01.780
Lain, dont look so glum.
02:01.780 --> 02:03.760
Its nothing to worry about.
02:03.760 --> 02:07.670
Its not such a bad thing... Im sorry for saying that.
02:07.670 --> 02:10.010
I guess it is bad thing for you.
02:10.010 --> 02:11.360
To see things so differently.
02:11.860 --> 02:13.360
I dont know.
02:13.830 --> 02:18.530
But I had a feeling that Im probably different from everybody else.
02:19.270 --> 02:22.740
I feel like Im the only person who can hear and see some things.
02:23.240 --> 02:24.960
It makes me very uncomfortable.
02:25.400 --> 02:26.960
I think that I will be disliked.
02:27.620 --> 02:28.960
Is that the reason?
02:30.080 --> 02:35.150
It might be. I think that youd have to be seen by a specialist.
02:36.300 --> 02:43.220
No. I want to see you. I dont want to see any of the other doctors here. They all scare me.
02:48.880 --> 02:50.780
Why dont we just keep this as a secret?
02:51.440 --> 02:52.340
A secret?
02:52.340 --> 02:56.750
Um hm. It will be our secret until you arent worried about it anymore.
02:57.240 --> 02:58.210
Is that ok?
02:58.210 --> 03:04.720
Im your big sister, remember? Im not going to take you anywhere that you will be scared.
03:05.190 --> 03:06.410
Toko-san.

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WEBVTT
00:00.220 --> 00:01.210
Good morning, Lain.
00:01.840 --> 00:03.830
Good morning, Toko-san.
00:03.830 --> 00:05.910
Have you seen anything since then?
00:06.360 --> 00:09.490
No, I havent. Honestly.
00:09.870 --> 00:11.160
Have you heard anything?
00:11.640 --> 00:15.300
Sometimes I hear something very confused.
00:15.870 --> 00:20.150
Very confused? One person? More than one?
00:20.550 --> 00:24.770
More than one. Men and women.
00:24.770 --> 00:26.770
Are they people you know?
00:26.770 --> 00:28.620
Probably not.
00:29.020 --> 00:34.200
You said that you heard things from the sky. What do you think is in the sky?
00:34.760 --> 00:36.640
Theres air.
00:36.640 --> 00:38.840
Uh, huh. And aside from that?
00:39.290 --> 00:43.350
Clouds. The sun. The stars.
00:44.000 --> 00:46.900
Do you know about the radio waves for TV and cell phones?
00:47.300 --> 00:50.480
Yes. The information travels wirelessly?
00:50.480 --> 00:52.960
Right. The information flies through the sky.
00:53.890 --> 00:56.700
Am I hearing that information?
00:56.700 --> 01:02.010
Hmm. It might be that you imagine you are hearing that information.
01:02.010 --> 01:04.170
Theres a sickness like that?
01:05.000 --> 01:05.940
There is.
01:06.360 --> 01:07.940
Its called delusion.
01:08.730 --> 01:12.800
Its a symptom of schizophrenia and neurosis.
01:12.800 --> 01:18.410
In simple terms, such symptoms may appear when you concentrate too much on something or feel stressed.
01:18.790 --> 01:19.550
But...
01:19.850 --> 01:20.630
But?
01:21.100 --> 01:25.520
Most of the time, you will hear things that are related to you, to some extent.
01:26.050 --> 01:28.700
For instance, they hear voices that bad-mouth them.
01:29.250 --> 01:30.570
Delusion of persecution?
01:30.570 --> 01:31.360
Right.
01:32.110 --> 01:34.470
Youve been studying up on this stuff.
01:35.740 --> 01:38.730
Ok. Ill fill you in a little more on this.
01:39.440 --> 01:54.150
The definition of "delusion" is taking a mistaken idea and believing in your own mind that it is correct.
01:54.460 --> 02:00.020
But for you, Lain, you say that you might have felt or sensed something.
02:00.020 --> 02:03.680
You don't have conviction in your feelings, so they aren't delusions.
02:04.120 --> 02:07.200
You have thoughts, in technical term, we call it delusional ideation.
02:07.200 --> 02:08.440
Delusional ideation?
02:08.600 --> 02:11.880
You can forget that phrase if youd like.
02:12.800 --> 02:18.880
As I mentioned before, a delusion is generally something intertwined with ones self.
02:18.880 --> 02:21.970
Most of the time, there are no delusions that don't involve me.
02:21.970 --> 02:23.440
Im not delusional?
02:23.440 --> 02:25.280
Fundamentally, no.
02:25.280 --> 02:33.040
Still, there are all sorts of delusions, and if you try to "pin" one of them onto someone, you may start pinning other ones on that person, too.

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WEBVTT
00:00.110 --> 00:02.950
What could happen?
00:02.950 --> 00:04.510
Hmm.
00:04.510 --> 00:10.000
There is a delusion some people have that they are being influenced by something.
00:10.620 --> 00:15.000
The delusion that the radio or TV or cell phones are trying to influence them somehow.
00:15.000 --> 00:24.170
The delusion that TV and cell phones have the power to touch them physically.
00:25.080 --> 00:29.880
You said that you thought you were being touched by something, didnt you, Lain?
00:29.880 --> 00:30.730
Uh, huh.
00:31.240 --> 00:33.240
It might not even be a delusion.
00:33.240 --> 00:36.330
There is an actual medical condition that makes people very sensitive physically.
00:36.330 --> 00:41.550
But you said that you dont feel like you are yourself, didnt you, Lain?
00:41.550 --> 00:46.040
That makes me think that you have the delusion that nothing exists.
00:46.040 --> 00:49.530
That you think you arent real and that existence isnt real.
00:49.530 --> 00:53.620
This can come as the result of poor self-esteem.
00:53.620 --> 00:55.800
Poor self-esteem?
00:55.800 --> 01:01.110
Its the feeling that one is worthless.
01:01.110 --> 01:05.110
Its similar to the delusion of persecution we were talking about.
01:05.660 --> 01:09.800
Im really sick.
01:09.800 --> 01:11.040
There are other kinds of delusions.
01:11.040 --> 01:12.460
I dont want to listen anymore.
01:12.460 --> 01:18.280
Some people have the delusion that they have a special, unique sickness.
01:18.280 --> 01:23.020
Its the sickness of thinking they have a sickness, when they really arent sick.
01:23.930 --> 01:30.220
I think that what you have, Lain, is mostly to do with this kind of delusion.
01:30.220 --> 01:33.800
The sickness of thinking that I am sick when Im not sick?
01:33.800 --> 01:34.910
Yes.
01:34.910 --> 01:41.800
I think that you have poor self-esteem, and that a small insecurity manifests itself in nightmares, and makes you think that you are sick.
01:41.800 --> 01:43.170
Can I be cured?
01:43.170 --> 01:44.510
Sure!
01:44.510 --> 01:46.910
After all, youre not sick in the first place.
01:47.550 --> 01:50.510
Im sorry to have alarmed you.
01:50.510 --> 01:57.200
Still, if you dont understand psychiatry well, you can use it to make all sorts of misguided conclusions.
01:57.200 --> 01:59.330
You can diagnose yourself as being sick.
01:59.330 --> 02:08.400
Most people go to the doctor when they or someone they know cant carry on their day-to-day activities.
02:08.400 --> 02:13.220
They come in to see a doctor and they are diagnosed or treated, and they are diagnosed sometimes as sick.
02:13.220 --> 02:20.480
So for someone like you, who can continue her own day-to-day activities without a problem, we cant really say that you are sick unless somethings bad enough that you to need hospitalization.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:03.240
Am I sick because I came to the hospital?
00:03.240 --> 00:08.770
Well, you can carry on with your life, but youre troubled, arent you Lain?
00:08.770 --> 00:12.910
Its the job of a counselor to help with that.
00:12.910 --> 00:18.000
Are you a counselor, Toko-san? You said before that youre a doctor.
00:18.000 --> 00:20.350
Im a counselor and a doctor.
00:20.350 --> 00:21.970
How are the two different?
00:21.970 --> 00:25.820
Well, both jobs have to do with helping people with psychological problems.
00:25.820 --> 00:28.640
Theyre similar in the sense that they have the same goals.
00:28.640 --> 00:32.880
But the difference is that as a counselor I care for patients differently than I do as a doctor, and that each job has different qualifications.
00:32.880 --> 00:43.040
Each job has its strengths and weaknesses, and I think its best when I can make their strengths compliment each other.
00:43.550 --> 00:47.130
Thats why Im a doctor and a counselor.
00:47.130 --> 00:51.260
Are you a doctor or a counselor when you see me?
00:51.260 --> 00:55.770
Im a counselor. I think its better for me to be a counselor when I see you.
00:56.440 --> 01:03.880
Im not mentally ill? You said that the things I see are hallucinations.
01:03.880 --> 01:14.910
Its true that hallucinations and delusions are symptoms of mental illness, and this is just my hunch, but you dont seem to be mentally ill to me.
01:14.910 --> 01:17.620
Do I pay too much attention to things?
01:17.620 --> 01:19.620
Yes, I think thats probably right.
01:20.060 --> 01:26.170
I think your tendency to observe things and listen to thing very carefully might be stressing you out.
01:26.170 --> 01:29.060
What can I do about it, Toko-san?
01:29.060 --> 01:33.950
Well... even if I told you not to mind things too much, youre going to mind things.
01:34.600 --> 01:41.600
I don't mind anymore. Im getting used to this. Still, I can't get used to that.
01:42.110 --> 01:43.240
"That"?
01:43.880 --> 01:46.200
Im not the me that I am right now.
01:46.970 --> 01:48.800
What kind of Lain are you?
01:49.260 --> 01:52.060
Im me. That person is, too.
01:52.950 --> 01:55.310
Why do you feel that way?
01:55.310 --> 02:01.930
I dont know. Have you ever thought that you arent you, Toko-san?
02:02.530 --> 02:10.150
Looking back on myself in the past, Ive wondered what I was doing sometimes.
02:10.150 --> 02:13.730
But Ive never thought at the time that I wasnt me.
02:14.770 --> 02:18.220
Do you feel that there are two of you, Lain?
02:18.220 --> 02:23.400
No. Im me and Im not me.
02:24.620 --> 02:26.220
Thats mysterious.
02:26.220 --> 02:30.240
But if you feel that way, that must be true for you.
02:30.240 --> 02:32.350
You dont have to feel that youre mistaken.
02:32.350 --> 02:35.040
But it isnt usual.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:03.150
Youre really yearning all the time, arent you, Lain?
00:03.730 --> 00:04.860
Probably...
00:05.400 --> 00:07.600
Im envious.
00:07.600 --> 00:10.770
Human perception is a wild thing.
00:10.770 --> 00:14.350
If you start feeling something, you start believing it.
00:14.350 --> 00:18.400
I don't know how to explain to anyone that I am really me.
00:19.040 --> 00:25.200
But being able to question that sense of self is a special talent.
00:25.730 --> 00:28.220
I dont want a talent like that.
00:28.220 --> 00:29.170
Yeah.
00:29.170 --> 00:32.280
Im sure you feel really strongly that way right now.
00:33.060 --> 00:37.710
But I feel that it can be a good thing for you too.
00:37.710 --> 00:47.220
I don't understand it well right now, but I think that if you can include and accept that as part of yourself, it would help you in the long run.
00:47.220 --> 00:49.310
I wont change?
00:49.310 --> 00:50.950
I dont know.
00:50.950 --> 00:56.640
You might change naturally and stop having nightmares.
00:56.640 --> 01:00.130
If that happens, youd be like most other kids.
01:00.130 --> 01:06.220
But I wont know if Ive gotten better. I might have nightmares again.
01:06.220 --> 01:10.480
Yeah. But things will change from now on.
01:10.480 --> 01:12.280
What do you mean?
01:12.280 --> 01:18.840
I mean that youre not alone. Im here and you can talk to me about things.
01:18.840 --> 01:21.730
Thats true, Toko-san.

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@ -0,0 +1,64 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.080 --> 00:02.150
Good morning, Toko-san.
00:02.150 --> 00:05.930
Good morning. How are you? Have you been feeling healthy?
00:05.930 --> 00:12.750
Uh huh. I thought about the things you talked about last month and Ive somehow been feeling better.
00:12.750 --> 00:14.860
Oh, thats great.
00:15.550 --> 00:19.550
Actually, though, its against the rules to talk about the things we talked about last month.
00:19.550 --> 00:24.660
In some people it can trigger something irreversible.
00:24.660 --> 00:26.480
Irreversible?
00:26.480 --> 00:33.200
Their sickness could worsen, and sometimes, patients can hurt themselves physically.
00:33.200 --> 00:34.550
Suicide?
00:34.550 --> 00:37.570
Well, that would be the worst-case scenario.
00:37.570 --> 00:40.110
I dont want to die.
00:40.110 --> 00:41.440
Of course not!
00:41.440 --> 00:44.080
Far from it.
00:44.080 --> 00:50.750
But when people become troubled emotionally, they start to see things and act differently than you or I would.
00:50.750 --> 00:52.570
See things differently?
00:52.570 --> 00:58.000
They can lose their fear of dying or hurting themselves.
00:58.000 --> 01:02.550
In fact they start to feel that dying or getting hurt are very good things.
01:03.000 --> 01:05.550
You cant understand that, can you?
01:05.550 --> 01:07.280
I am afraid of those things.
01:07.280 --> 01:12.530
Sure! Me too. Were the same way. Thats normal.
01:12.860 --> 01:14.530
Ok.

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WEBVTT
00:00.470 --> 00:03.100
Have you seen or heard anything since then?
00:03.780 --> 00:04.340
No.
00:05.040 --> 00:06.310
See!
00:07.120 --> 00:09.190
It was a state of mind, Lain.
00:10.060 --> 00:14.340
I think that you probably wont see them again, but if you do, dont get discouraged.
00:14.950 --> 00:16.180
Youll get over it gradually.
00:17.110 --> 00:18.280
I wont get better right away?
00:18.670 --> 00:24.870
Hmm. I dont know. How old were you when you started having problems with them?
00:25.740 --> 00:26.910
I was eleven.
00:27.670 --> 00:34.110
So its been over a year now. During that time, how often did it happen?
00:34.720 --> 00:37.400
I dont remember... once.
00:38.820 --> 00:43.800
Sometimes, even if there doesn't seem to be an explanation for it immediately, these things may go away.
00:44.670 --> 00:49.550
But if you decide that theyve gone away completely and become complacent, theres a chance that they may come back.
00:50.110 --> 00:57.940
I cant say for certain that that will happen with you, but even if you dont see them for a while, Id like you to continue what youve been doing up till now.
00:59.200 --> 01:02.080
Do you want to stop coming here, Lain?
01:02.440 --> 01:06.590
No. I like seeing you.
01:07.190 --> 01:07.710
Thank you.
01:08.540 --> 01:09.870
I guess that theres no problem, then.
01:11.100 --> 01:16.200
Youre doing well, but youll promise me that you will keep coming here?
01:16.960 --> 01:20.630
Yes. In exchange, I want you to teach me some things.
01:21.260 --> 01:21.990
Why?
01:22.200 --> 01:23.070
For homework?
01:24.020 --> 01:24.630
Sure.
01:25.110 --> 01:30.190
You wont believe it, but I was pretty sharp in junior high school.
01:31.000 --> 01:31.560
Ha, ha.
01:32.280 --> 01:33.560
Learning to read and write was tough, though.
01:34.160 --> 01:40.080
I dont mean that. I want to know more about your work. Is that ok?
01:41.480 --> 01:42.960
Hmm.
01:42.980 --> 01:54.320
I don't think its a very good idea, but if youre really curious, ok. Learning about things that make you curious is a great way to study.
01:55.220 --> 01:57.880
But you have to make time for your schoolwork, too.
01:58.820 --> 02:00.260
Ill promise to teach you about my work if you promise to do your schoolwork.
02:00.580 --> 02:02.110
Can you promise me that?
02:03.040 --> 02:04.380
Yes, I promise.
02:05.100 --> 02:06.200
And if you break your promise...
02:06.830 --> 02:08.120
Ill whack you with a blowfish!

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WEBVTT
00:00.320 --> 00:03.870
You are a counselor and a psychiatrist, Toko-san?
00:04.540 --> 00:07.350
And a psychiatrist is someone who heals mental illnesses?
00:07.800 --> 00:16.200
Uh huh. Put simply, Im a doctor of the mind. As I mentioned before, mental illness is very complex.
00:17.040 --> 00:19.960
What is mental illness?
00:20.400 --> 00:29.500
Basically, a persons mind becomes disturbed for some reason, and the person is unable to continue functioning.
00:30.390 --> 00:33.100
What sort of reason, for instance?
00:34.180 --> 00:35.360
There can be many reasons.
00:35.910 --> 00:42.440
Problems with a living environment or work environment can be reasons.
00:43.100 --> 00:45.600
Sudden, psychological shock can also be a reason.
00:46.040 --> 00:51.280
The sudden death of a well-loved pet can trigger mental illness.
00:52.180 --> 00:56.310
Sometimes people become mentally ill because of something that happens to them physically.
00:57.220 --> 01:00.060
A car accident or some other kind of physical trauma can be a cause.
01:00.540 --> 01:03.740
Also, people who drink too much can damage the function of their brains.
01:04.350 --> 01:05.560
Alcoholism?
01:05.830 --> 01:06.320
Exactly.
01:06.540 --> 01:07.760
Youve been studying!
01:08.840 --> 01:12.950
If you drink too much the alcohol content in your blood will rise.
01:13.550 --> 01:16.510
Youve seen drunk people wobble around without balance, havent you?
01:17.420 --> 01:20.990
Theyre in an alcoholic stupor.
01:21.700 --> 01:24.080
But normal people arent that way, are they?
01:24.320 --> 01:25.680
No, they can be.
01:26.220 --> 01:29.550
It takes about 24 hours for alcohol to leave the human body.
01:30.480 --> 01:39.030
If you drink a lot everyday for a year or so—if you stay drunk long enough—youll your perception will start to change.
01:39.960 --> 01:43.200
Your brain will start to deteriorate.
01:43.760 --> 01:44.560
Thats scary.
01:44.740 --> 01:49.100
It is scary. I still have some sake now and then, though.
01:49.900 --> 01:50.840
Isnt that dangerous?
01:51.280 --> 01:51.590
Ha, ha.
01:51.670 --> 01:52.420
Oh, a little bit.
01:53.440 --> 01:54.920
And smoking is bad too.
01:55.230 --> 01:58.740
But having a drink with friends every now and then can help relieve stress.
01:59.750 --> 02:04.280
Relieving stress is very important for the bodys health.
02:05.220 --> 02:08.140
I dont understand what stress is.
02:09.950 --> 02:12.760
Remember when you didnt like coming here at first?
02:13.460 --> 02:13.800
Yes.
02:14.240 --> 02:17.860
Stress is what we call the cause of that discomfort.
02:18.900 --> 02:20.070
Youre glad that the discomfort is gone, arent you?
02:20.900 --> 02:23.310
Yes. What other kinds of mental illness are there?
02:24.230 --> 02:29.140
Could you excuse me? Ive been talking so much and Im a little thirsty.

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WEBVTT
00:02.150 --> 00:08.720
I wanted to ask last time, but why do have that kind of hairstyle?
00:09.980 --> 00:11.640
Its weird?
00:12.020 --> 00:17.080
No, its great! You really look good that way. Is it a popular look at your school?
00:18.040 --> 00:20.270
No. Its just my own style.
00:21.950 --> 00:29.120
You mentioned that you want to be like other kids. Why do you have a unique look?
00:30.180 --> 00:38.000
It comes from the right, and probably, thats why it goes out of the left. Thats why...
00:38.990 --> 00:48.540
It works a little bit like a magic charm, then. I used have a magic charm, too.
00:48.920 --> 00:49.720
You did, Toko-san?
00:50.060 --> 00:50.480
Sure.
00:50.480 --> 00:55.110
It didnt have to do with hairstyle, but I used to have a lucky rabbits foot.
00:55.670 --> 01:00.120
I used to believe that it would keep me safe and happy, and I tied it to my backpack.
01:00.980 --> 01:03.950
Looking back, it seems so ghastly.
01:04.590 --> 01:08.160
To tie a little bunnys foot to my backpack.
01:09.710 --> 01:13.310
But then again, believing in the rabbits foot really made me feel safer.
01:14.440 --> 01:15.140
A magic charm?
01:15.870 --> 01:16.070
Yeah.
01:17.750 --> 01:20.070
Your hair looks really good, though, Lain.
01:21.220 --> 01:25.300
If you had a hairstyle like everyone elses, it wouldnt be like you.
01:26.480 --> 01:28.910
I think you look great the way you are.

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WEBVTT
00:00.440 --> 00:08.190
You know about neurosis? Wow, Lain. Youre going to have to start counseling me.
00:09.080 --> 00:12.020
I know the word, not its meaning.
00:13.030 --> 00:13.950
What kind of image?
00:14.900 --> 00:17.950
The mind changes and becomes distorted?
00:18.640 --> 00:20.780
Yes. Youve got the general idea.
00:21.580 --> 00:24.260
Thats awful. You wont teach me anymore?
00:24.480 --> 00:24.960
No.
00:24.960 --> 00:27.720
Im really telling you that you got the general idea.
00:28.830 --> 00:36.310
Neurosis is a state in which there is nothing wrong with a person physically, yet the person has irrational fears and perceives threats.
00:36.680 --> 00:39.270
This places a lot of stress on the person and makes her feel sick.
00:40.560 --> 00:42.270
Its only inside of their heads?
00:42.660 --> 00:45.320
We used to think so.
00:46.040 --> 00:51.760
But after a lot of research, we think that an imbalance of the autonomic nerves in the brain is related to it.
00:52.440 --> 00:55.910
What I mean is, something is wrong in the body, too.
00:57.430 --> 01:01.670
We used to categorize physical symptoms as psychosomatic.
01:02.310 --> 01:08.160
But weve been finding more and more that conditions we thought were only of the mind involve the body itself.
01:08.940 --> 01:10.360
Psychosomatic?
01:11.180 --> 01:14.060
Oh, Lain, if you ask so many questions, your head is going to explode!
01:15.060 --> 01:19.950
Youve heard about people who lose a lot of weight because of stress, or go bald?
01:20.390 --> 01:21.040
Thats psychosomatic.
01:22.200 --> 01:24.180
Lain, you dont, by any chance...
01:24.460 --> 01:25.520
No, I dont have that kind of problem.
01:28.430 --> 01:30.020
Oh, Im relieved. That was hasty of me!

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WEBVTT
00:00.680 --> 00:03.760
Who decides the names of diseases?
00:04.040 --> 00:05.840
Various doctors.
00:06.120 --> 00:08.520
But we have general criterions.
00:08.840 --> 00:13.540
We have the ICD and the DSM, which are international standards for the definition of mental diseases.
00:13.540 --> 00:20.580
We know that if a person has a certain set of symptoms, we can consult these standards and find the exact name of the disease the person is suffering from.
00:20.620 --> 00:23.400
As you know, the mind can be a difficult thing to understand.
00:23.420 --> 00:28.920
For that reason, psychiatrists have publications, and we communicate all the time, sharing our data and our understanding of mental illness.
00:28.920 --> 00:32.440
We accumulate data and categorize it so that we can diagnose patients as correctly as possible.
00:32.520 --> 00:35.760
Theres mental illness you don't understand? Not even you?
00:36.540 --> 00:41.160
To tell you the truth, we dont understand much of this at all.
00:41.160 --> 00:48.040
If there has been a successful treatment method for a patient with a certain disease in the past, we can apply that treatment method toward a patient suffering from the same disease in the present.
00:48.040 --> 00:50.040
Much of this has to do with experience.
00:50.300 --> 00:52.500
You do this even if you dont know if a person can be cured?
00:52.500 --> 00:53.080
Right.
00:53.080 --> 00:55.300
You cant tell if a person will be cured.
00:55.300 --> 01:00.140
We can only try our best to heal and help with our experience from the past.
01:00.140 --> 01:02.960
Thats usually the case.
01:03.780 --> 01:09.480
But from the point of view of the patient, knowing if one will become better is very important.
01:09.520 --> 01:13.360
In fact, the understanding of the mechanisms behind getting better is an area of study of its own.
01:13.700 --> 01:17.640
I see. It would be so much better if we could understand everything.

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WEBVTT
00:00.220 --> 00:04.640
Do you have many memories from your childhood?
00:05.460 --> 00:07.580
Memories? Do you mean records?
00:07.940 --> 00:10.420
Well, memories and records arent exactly the same.
00:10.880 --> 00:12.840
Don't think about it too much.
00:13.260 --> 00:16.580
If youve traveled somewhere during summer vacation...
00:17.280 --> 00:19.720
I havent traveled anywhere during summer vacation.
00:20.520 --> 00:21.860
Im sorry.
00:22.720 --> 00:29.240
In my youth, both of my parents worked, so I didnt get to travel very much.
00:29.440 --> 00:35.360
I didnt like it when I went back to school after vacation and other kids would ask me where I went or what I did during the summer.
00:35.420 --> 00:38.320
Whats the difference between a memory and a record?
00:39.640 --> 00:47.300
From a medical standpoint, a record is something documented that lists exactly what happened, when and where.
00:47.880 --> 00:49.520
A memory is more subjective.
00:49.540 --> 00:51.300
Its what you remember personally.
00:51.440 --> 00:55.720
Its something in your mind that you can access from time to time.
00:56.380 --> 00:59.740
But Lain, doesnt all this stuff bore you?
01:00.280 --> 01:04.340
No. How does a memory enter the brain?
01:05.360 --> 01:11.900
How? Thats a pretty complicated subject. Are you sure you want to get into it?

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WEBVTT
00:01.520 --> 00:04.520
There are different kinds of memories.
00:04.960 --> 00:07.420
First of all, theres ones memory of oneself.
00:07.720 --> 00:10.040
You know what self- understanding is?
00:10.560 --> 00:14.040
You know that you are a girl named Lain with a certain face and height and weight?
00:14.420 --> 00:16.960
Thats all recorded at a molecular level.
00:18.200 --> 00:22.900
Aside from the brain, there are places throughout the body that carry residues of things that have happened.
00:23.480 --> 00:29.160
You know that if you get cut, you bleed, but if you wait a while, it gets scab and heals?
00:29.840 --> 00:33.660
That has to do with information stored in cells going to work.
00:34.800 --> 00:38.760
Take a look at athletes and people who have gone through intense physical training.
00:38.800 --> 00:40.860
They seem to do things effortlessly.
00:41.260 --> 00:44.540
Thats because their bodies have their own recollection or memory.
00:45.140 --> 00:48.020
If you generate a recording, you have a memory?
00:48.540 --> 00:52.840
You might be able to say that sometimes, but not always.
00:53.120 --> 00:55.420
Humans are haphazard and unpredictable, arent they?
00:55.520 --> 00:58.980
I dont remember everything that happened to me as a kid precisely.
00:59.560 --> 01:05.120
I have happy memories of times I spent with my family, but my family might not have happy memories of those times at all.
01:05.380 --> 01:10.800
I may have had misperceptions in the moment, or I may have remembered things incorrectly and by mistake.
01:11.700 --> 01:16.100
But we all walk around with memories, thinking that what we remember is what actually happened.
01:16.780 --> 01:19.680
Suppose you meet an old friend that you havent seen in a long time.
01:19.820 --> 01:25.000
Dont you remember the things you used to do with that person right away?
01:25.860 --> 01:30.980
Your memory has a way of linking things together.
01:31.720 --> 01:33.880
If you cant link things together, youre sick?
01:34.760 --> 01:37.700
Well, there is something called memory impediment.
01:37.700 --> 01:43.020
People who have this cant remember things that happened only moments ago.
01:43.180 --> 01:45.000
They have no idea of how things in the past took place.
01:45.020 --> 01:47.160
They dont know what happened and in what order.
01:47.160 --> 01:52.020
Since they dont want anyone to know that they dont remember things, they often make up stories about the past to fool people.
01:52.020 --> 01:54.340
Humans are complex.
01:54.340 --> 01:55.700
We do all sorts of things.
01:56.460 --> 02:00.600
Youve seen senile old people on TV shows, havent you?
02:01.280 --> 02:05.100
As humans, there are some things we cant do anything about.
02:05.900 --> 02:07.480
Things we cant do anything about?
02:07.600 --> 02:10.800
Im not saying that youre sick, Lain.
02:11.060 --> 02:13.900
There are things we cant do anything about, arent there?
02:14.440 --> 02:16.420
We cant flap our arms and fly, can we?
02:16.960 --> 02:19.620
There are memories in the body and the brain?
02:19.980 --> 02:23.600
There are still many things we dont understand.
02:24.020 --> 02:29.360
The human brain is made up of many different things.
02:30.220 --> 02:36.460
When something is recorded there, there is a change that takes place that becomes the foundation for memories.
02:37.140 --> 02:38.460
I dont understand.
02:39.240 --> 02:40.540
Yeah.
02:40.540 --> 02:44.340
When you go to high school and college, you can study up on all this stuff.
02:44.860 --> 02:47.540
But its good that you have a healthy curiosity.
02:48.000 --> 02:51.320
I dont think youre sick, Lain.
02:52.200 --> 02:55.680
I feel that my memories arent my memories.
02:56.280 --> 02:59.700
Sure! I feel that way sometimes, too.
03:00.020 --> 03:04.040
Even when its me. But I dont remember anything else.
03:04.140 --> 03:07.940
Youve just forgotten something, thats all.
03:07.960 --> 03:10.660
Didnt I say that human beings are haphazard and unpredictable?
03:10.900 --> 03:15.240
We remember things the way we want to remember them and often forget what we want to.
03:15.340 --> 03:16.440
Thats being human.
03:16.440 --> 03:17.380
Thats normal.
03:17.760 --> 03:18.920
Normal?
03:19.060 --> 03:23.660
Yes. You dwell on things too much, Lain. All those things are normal.

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WEBVTT
00:00.550 --> 00:05.310
I wondered if your name has anything to do with R. D. Laing. Oh, it couldnt, could it?
00:05.940 --> 00:07.110
R.D. Laing?
00:07.580 --> 00:08.440
Its a persons name.
00:09.200 --> 00:11.040
An English psychiatrist.
00:11.390 --> 00:12.540
He was an unusual person.
00:13.790 --> 00:16.100
The titles of some of his books are very interesting.
00:16.990 --> 00:19.110
One of them is: "I Love, Love, Really Love."
00:19.900 --> 00:21.390
"I Love, Love, Really Love"?
00:21.840 --> 00:34.750
I read it when I was in college and I dont remember much of it, but its about two lovers—a man and a woman—and the woman asks the man if he loves her.
00:35.240 --> 00:35.820
And?
00:36.470 --> 00:39.500
Well of course, the man replies that he loves her.
00:39.960 --> 00:43.680
But the woman isn't satisfied, and asks more and more questions.
00:44.390 --> 00:45.470
I dont understand.
00:46.300 --> 00:50.720
OK. Lets see. Do you like me, Lain?
00:51.510 --> 00:52.340
Yes, I do.
00:52.920 --> 00:55.160
More than your dad? More than your mom?
00:56.070 --> 00:56.310
Yes.
00:56.950 --> 00:58.680
That makes me happy. Do you mean it?
00:59.300 --> 00:59.870
Yes I do.
01:00.360 --> 01:02.680
Are you happy when youre here?
01:03.500 --> 01:06.740
I dont really understand, but I probably am.
01:07.100 --> 01:09.140
Do you like talking to me?
01:09.920 --> 01:10.190
Yes.
01:10.910 --> 01:12.180
What do you like about me?
01:13.220 --> 01:17.320
Youre kind and you listen to me.
01:18.180 --> 01:21.750
Which do you like more? That Im kind, or that I listen?
01:22.680 --> 01:23.320
Which?
01:23.780 --> 01:24.720
Yes, which?
01:25.680 --> 01:26.840
I like you because youre kind.
01:26.840 --> 01:30.240
How am I kind to you?
01:31.100 --> 01:33.470
You dont get angry and youre polite.
01:33.470 --> 01:35.780
But there are lots of people besides me who dont get angry at you.
01:36.280 --> 01:39.220
There are lots of people who are polite to you.
01:39.220 --> 01:39.550
Arent there?
01:40.380 --> 01:42.670
Do you really like me?
01:43.500 --> 01:45.150
I dont really know.
01:45.660 --> 01:47.660
Do I have to think about all this stuff?
01:48.360 --> 01:49.420
Lets stop this.
01:49.920 --> 01:53.500
I feel like I might start to not like you.
01:53.500 --> 01:55.500

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@ -0,0 +1,124 @@
WEBVTT
00:02.310 --> 00:05.510
Im sorry. I just was trying to explain this issue to you.
00:06.560 --> 00:10.480
I like you too Lain, though Im not sure why.
00:11.300 --> 00:16.070
I suppose I just enjoy talking to you. Thats it.
00:17.020 --> 00:21.060
Its probably just because I like my job!
00:22.030 --> 00:24.560
I just thought it had to do with you, but I guess not.
00:25.740 --> 00:28.960
It is enough for me to be able to understand my feelings.
00:29.940 --> 00:41.060
I can never read your mind, so I can never know that you like me as much as I like you.
00:42.590 --> 00:45.420
Sounds lonely...
00:46.100 --> 00:50.350
Im sorry, but you know, this is one of the ways for me to know that.
00:51.900 --> 00:56.300
Im so happy with you saying that you like me.
00:57.630 --> 01:00.740
Are you happy with me saying I like you?
01:01.480 --> 01:02.540
Yes, indeed.
01:03.740 --> 01:10.510
Yes, that is enough. Lain, I like you.
01:11.580 --> 01:18.060
But still, as you can never comprehend all of me, it is impossible for me to know everything about you.
01:19.040 --> 01:24.140
If we could know everything about each other, I could be you and vice versa.
01:24.910 --> 01:30.110
I mean you do not have to be Lain unless we are different people.
01:31.380 --> 01:35.760
I really like Lain even though Lain is hard to understand sometimes.
01:36.920 --> 01:38.700
You like the mysterious Lain?
01:39.340 --> 01:44.670
Well, I like Lain who I dont know very well. Of course, that is not all I like.
01:45.800 --> 01:48.670
I want to know everything about you!!
01:49.180 --> 01:53.270
So do I! But its impossible.
01:54.060 --> 01:54.640
Impossible?
01:54.980 --> 01:58.920
Yes. That is because even I dont know who I am!
01:59.920 --> 02:05.880
Well, I dont know how to explain this to you. Lain is Lain and I am me.
02:07.420 --> 02:12.500
Actually it might be still impossible even if we became the same person.
02:13.590 --> 02:14.520
The same person?
02:14.950 --> 02:18.260
Yes, Lain and I are exactly the same!
02:19.340 --> 02:24.060
We see the same things, have the same ideas and take same actions.
02:24.960 --> 02:26.630
Everything.
02:28.230 --> 02:30.790
Even our looks are the same!
02:31.160 --> 02:36.140
In this situation, there is only an identity that you KEEP, isn't there?
02:39.710 --> 02:43.840
If you thought "Here is Lain," then I cannot exist there.
02:42.060 --> 02:45.280
Yet even if such an identification is gone.
02:44.020 --> 02:45.270
The same thing can happen to you!
02:46.590 --> 02:49.840
That is why its impossible to understand each other at the same time.
02:50.920 --> 02:54.200
But what if you would answer every question I ask.
02:55.000 --> 02:55.860
Still, it would be impossible?
02:56.740 --> 02:59.600
Right, but they are not all possible questions, are they?
03:00.480 --> 03:10.640
I need time to answer those questions and those answers could be changed eventually, such as I used to think one thing, but now I have changed my mind — something like that.
03:11.550 --> 03:13.780
It's impossible after all, isnt it?
03:14.780 --> 03:22.300
Yes, I wish I could go inside your mind and answer everything you want to know...

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@ -0,0 +1,100 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.330 --> 00:01.700
Are you happy at your school?
00:02.600 --> 00:04.400
Yes, I am!
00:05.130 --> 00:06.080
What makes you so happy!
00:07.020 --> 00:10.650
You know, playing and talking with my best friend.
00:11.610 --> 00:14.570
Thats good! It is a good thing to like school, isnt it?
00:15.260 --> 00:17.280
Were you happy?
00:18.360 --> 00:24.530
Not really, because I didnt have many friends there.
00:26.700 --> 00:29.210
You feel sad without friends at school.
00:30.500 --> 00:33.650
Yeah... Im sorry
00:34.820 --> 00:35.360
About what?
00:36.040 --> 00:37.650
That story reminds you of a bad memory.
00:40.200 --> 00:44.660
Well, it certainly wasnt good memory, but thats OK.
00:45.250 --> 00:52.920
I actually feel sorry for my past, but my current job makes me think that was a good experience for me.
00:53.680 --> 00:54.680
Good experience?
00:55.730 --> 00:57.370
Yes.
00:58.060 --> 01:05.860
For example, such an experience is sometimes so useful to analyze the psychology of those who doesnt want to go to school.
01:06.820 --> 01:07.620
It sounds difficult.
01:08.780 --> 01:16.140
Im sorry, Im talking about myself now! Whenever I talk about my job, I tend to get lost in it.
01:16.530 --> 01:20.240
I guess I would make a better patient.
01:21.730 --> 01:26.370
Ok, lets change the subject. Well, what is your best friend like?
01:26.700 --> 01:30.370
She is really cheerful and nice to me. Im really happy around her.
01:31.000 --> 01:32.370
What's her name?
01:33.930 --> 01:34.720
Misato.
01:35.250 --> 01:40.130
OK... Misato. What do you usually do together?
01:40.940 --> 01:46.140
We read books together at her place and I listen to her playing violin sometimes.
01:46.500 --> 01:48.900
Wow, she can play the violin.
01:49.080 --> 01:50.140
Awesome!
01:50.850 --> 01:51.740
She must be a good friend.
01:52.690 --> 01:55.600
Why dont you come over with her next time?
01:57.160 --> 02:00.020
But she is so shy.
02:01.690 --> 02:02.800
So shy?
02:03.520 --> 02:08.810
Maybe... Ill ask her anyway. Im guessing she wouldnt want to.
02:09.570 --> 02:11.980
Well, I wish she could.

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WEBVTT
00:00.410 --> 00:03.740
Touko-san, deja vu isnt an illness, is it?
00:04.810 --> 00:05.160
No.
00:05.770 --> 00:10.920
You may also feel its the first time youve seen a scene which youve seen before.
00:11.530 --> 00:14.290
Both situations have nothing to do with a disease.
00:15.090 --> 00:18.840
Even normal people sometimes have an experience of deja vu.
00:19.580 --> 00:21.840
What a relief! I feel better now.
00:23.090 --> 00:26.890
Do you feel anything else when you experience deja vu?
00:28.170 --> 00:35.080
Time is strange for some reason. I cant figure out if time is fast or slow.
00:36.380 --> 00:39.980
Do you feel its real or kind of ordinary?
00:40.820 --> 00:47.050
Well, it could be... or could not be... I dont know... maybe not...
00:47.770 --> 00:51.500
Is it nebular? Or you just cant comprehend...
00:51.980 --> 00:54.720
I just feel something is different.
00:55.610 --> 01:03.850
Even though I recognize that I am playing in my house, I feel like it isnt my house.
01:04.500 --> 01:11.340
And even though I dont know where it is, when I play at a park that Ive never seen, for me it seems like the place I usually use.
01:11.890 --> 01:18.180
Strange... Do you feel comfortable or uneasy when you are there?
01:19.100 --> 01:22.810
I dont know, but Lain was laughing when it happened.
01:24.300 --> 01:27.330
Not yourself but Lain?
01:28.130 --> 01:31.780
I cant explain very well but it was Lain
01:33.170 --> 01:35.760
Where were you at that time?
01:36.370 --> 01:41.810
Lets see... I dont know, because I was just watching her...
01:42.140 --> 01:44.800
I mean, where from did you observe her?
01:45.490 --> 01:49.920
Like, were you standing on the ground, or you could you see her from the sky...?
01:49.920 --> 01:55.120
Well... I dont know... It was like I saw myself on the TV... I guess...
01:55.120 --> 01:59.720
Lain, are you all right? You dont have to bring it back by force. Im sorry.
02:00.060 --> 02:05.610
I feel compelled to ask questions.... OK, thats all for today!
02:06.060 --> 02:09.080
How do you express it in technical jargon?
02:09.080 --> 02:10.730
No, lets stop for now.
02:11.500 --> 02:14.170
I really want to know about myself!
02:15.100 --> 02:17.850
OK, so this is the last lesson.
02:18.970 --> 02:28.520
In technical jargon, we call it "alienation of perception." It means that you experience something as if somebody else experienced it.
02:30.410 --> 02:32.820
Its an illness, isnt it?
02:33.650 --> 02:38.680
There is one called "depersonalization" which is that you cannot feel yourself, but you couldnt have it.
02:39.100 --> 02:43.100
So stop worrying about it.
02:43.500 --> 02:45.640
You cant prove that I dont.
02:45.640 --> 02:50.400
Yes, but it doesnt worry you. So I can say that youre not sick.
02:51.060 --> 02:55.420
Well, I shouldnt have said that; it just makes you worried.
02:56.120 --> 02:57.600
I guess I made a mistake...
02:57.850 --> 02:58.690
No, you didnt.
02:59.250 --> 03:04.880
You didnt make any mistakes because I insisted that you should answer my question.
03:06.170 --> 03:11.650
Still, I want to study a lot in order to be like you, Touko-san.
03:12.460 --> 03:13.440
Lain...

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WEBVTT
00:00.860 --> 00:03.860
The ego is your sense of who you are, isnt it?
00:04.600 --> 00:12.560
Yes, but more technically phrased, the ego is a part of the mind you use to experience as yourself and to recognize yourself.
00:12.970 --> 00:13.690
Do you get it?
00:14.200 --> 00:14.970
Not at all.
00:15.530 --> 00:19.160
Ok, so you have an idea that you are Lain.
00:19.960 --> 00:23.090
In such the structural element, the "EGO" is right there.
00:24.020 --> 00:28.880
Linguistically, "myself" describes all of you, right?
00:29.860 --> 00:36.640
"Ego" is, however, one of the parts of your mind you use to recognize that all of experiences I have had were mine.
00:38.000 --> 00:41.410
Saying "its just to realize that you are yourself" is somewhat better to understand?
00:42.260 --> 00:46.040
I can get the last part, but it is still beyond my understanding.
00:46.210 --> 00:48.240
I like your honesty.
00:49.570 --> 00:56.380
So the girl, Lain, has various emotions, such as kindness, loneliness and things like that.
00:57.060 --> 01:00.240
Now the EGO is what is left when you dont feel any emotions.
01:00.890 --> 01:03.300
I guess I understand a little...
01:04.060 --> 01:10.730
For example, the Lain who woke up this morning and what Lain is now here are the same, right?
01:11.450 --> 01:11.780
Right.
01:12.360 --> 01:14.890
What Lain will be tomorrow should be the same as those.
01:15.650 --> 01:16.580
I guess so.
01:16.970 --> 01:28.560
I mean if your ego works properly, you can recognize that you exist continuously and confirm that that existence is "myself." If your ego doesnt work properly...
01:28.720 --> 01:29.980
If it doesnt?
01:30.640 --> 01:33.300
We call such a situation "identity disorder" in the medical field.
01:34.260 --> 01:39.360
On the other hand, there is also an "isolation disorder" which means you think that you are not yourself.
01:39.930 --> 01:42.200
He, he, they sound like bad diseases, dont they?
01:44.010 --> 01:48.840
Yet anyone your age usually doesnt complete his or her ego until later.
01:49.890 --> 01:53.640
You just can gradually recognize yourself with age.
01:54.880 --> 01:57.490
So is it wrong to think that I understand myself at my age?
01:58.000 --> 02:01.100
It just happens to be that such things happen all the time.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:06.000
If I became sick, what would you do for it?
00:06.000 --> 00:09.000
If you were sick?
00:09.000 --> 00:11.080
I mean if...
00:11.510 --> 00:21.460
Well, since you are still young, I wouldnt use any medical treatment for such minor symptoms... the way one uses medicine to cure disease.
00:21.460 --> 00:23.910
Why wouldnt you use them?
00:23.910 --> 00:27.680
Lain, you already have the power to recover your health from disease.
00:27.680 --> 00:32.150
If you depend on using those medicines, however, your body becomes weaker.
00:32.620 --> 00:37.800
Usually children shouldnt take medicine too much anyway.
00:37.800 --> 00:39.800
So what are you going to do?
00:39.800 --> 00:47.060
Lets see... I will use psychotherapy to help you, like talking with you as we do now.
00:47.060 --> 00:48.350
Just talking?
00:48.730 --> 00:54.510
Hmm, its difficult to explain it. For example, we have a program to recover people from alcoholism.
00:54.510 --> 01:00.770
In this program, they discuss and present what make them drink so much and listen to each others stories.
01:01.460 --> 01:06.860
We call it "group therapy." I dont like it though.
01:06.860 --> 01:08.460
Why you dont like it?
01:08.460 --> 01:14.350
I think people who regain their health from those group therapies would make the same mistakes later.
01:15.020 --> 01:21.840
They think that they can recover themselves from alcoholism simply by group conversation, but when they are alone, they will start drinking again.
01:22.330 --> 01:24.550
Ive seen this happen a lot.
01:24.550 --> 01:26.660
So what would you do?
01:26.660 --> 01:33.130
I try to talk one-on-one as I do with you, Lain.
01:33.530 --> 01:34.480
And?
01:34.480 --> 01:38.000
And then, I suggest those patients to think about themselves.
01:38.420 --> 01:45.910
I have nothing particular to support them but I try to analyze what they think on neutral ground.
01:46.510 --> 01:52.660
This helps them to recognize what is wrong with themselves, and then they try to recover their own health.
01:52.660 --> 01:54.880
We call it "non-supportive psychotherapy".
01:55.820 --> 01:59.820
If they start recognizing there is a problem, it means they are already fine.
01:59.820 --> 02:03.600
Is that enough to recover them from diseases? Sound simple!
02:03.600 --> 02:06.370
Right, it sounds so simple.
02:06.370 --> 02:11.170
In fact, however, those things are more complicated and difficult to do than you think.
02:11.170 --> 02:13.170
Difficult?
02:14.710 --> 02:21.510
(yawn) Im sorry. I need more sleep.
02:21.510 --> 02:26.600
You must be tired. Should you take a break?

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:04.880
When you get sick in the head, your head is really sick?
00:04.880 --> 00:10.800
The brain isnt the only part of the body involved in mental illness, but it is very important.
00:10.800 --> 00:15.660
We know that many types of disease occur because of trauma to the brain.
00:15.660 --> 00:19.600
When you get sick in the brain, is your mind is really sick?
00:19.600 --> 00:26.000
The human brain is very complex, and there are many things we dont understand about it.
00:26.000 --> 00:30.950
We know a little about where and when things take place in the brain.
00:30.950 --> 00:32.910
Memories are stored in the hippocampus.
00:32.910 --> 00:33.680
Yes.
00:33.680 --> 00:41.570
There is the frontal lobe and the occipital lobe, and there are many other parts of the brain that have different functions.
00:42.170 --> 00:44.620
Many chemical processes take place in the brain.
00:44.620 --> 00:48.440
When they do, a lot of information is exchanged.
00:48.680 --> 00:50.570
Thats how the brain gets sick?
00:50.570 --> 00:52.860
Sometimes the brain does get sick that way.
00:52.860 --> 01:04.640
If there is an abnormal change in the brains chemical process, or if the parts of the brain responsible for processing information are physically damaged and not working properly, there could be disease.
01:04.640 --> 01:07.570
We call this kind of disease organic psychosis.
01:07.570 --> 01:10.350
Is this hard to understand?
01:10.350 --> 01:16.600
I understand. People have their brainwaves tested and have CAT scans to check for it.
01:16.600 --> 01:21.220
Are they teaching you that at school already? Did you teach yourself?
01:21.620 --> 01:27.570
I checked it out on the Web. I had a test done before, and I was curious.
01:28.000 --> 01:33.130
Lain, if youre doing all this research, you dont have to see me.
01:33.130 --> 01:39.400
No, its not like that. I learn a lot from you. It isnt like the things I learn from books.
01:40.370 --> 01:43.420
Im sorry, Lain. Im not feeling very well.
01:45.120 --> 01:47.990
There is brain research at this research center, isn't there?
01:48.890 --> 01:49.580
Yes.
01:50.260 --> 01:51.530
What kind of research?
01:52.000 --> 01:58.420
Im not a specialist and I dont work in that area, so I cant say anything specifically.
01:58.420 --> 02:02.330
But its on the Web. All sorts of research takes place.
02:02.330 --> 02:09.460
Lain, can I ask you a favor? Im not feeling very well. Can we end for today?
02:10.440 --> 02:12.730
Im sorry, Toko-san.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:03.550
What kind of research do you do?
00:04.060 --> 00:07.800
Research? I never mentioned that...
00:07.800 --> 00:09.800
But this is a research center, isnt it?
00:10.750 --> 00:15.240
Im still an apprentice. I havent done any of my own research.
00:15.240 --> 00:17.350
Youre an apprentice after being here for 3 years?
00:18.440 --> 00:20.000
How did you know...
00:20.000 --> 00:23.910
You told me yourself.
00:25.310 --> 00:26.950
I did?
00:27.370 --> 00:28.730
Im sorry.
00:28.730 --> 00:31.350
Somehow, I havent been feeling very good lately.
00:32.080 --> 00:35.040
Could you ask me fewer questions today?
00:35.040 --> 00:38.730
Either that, or can we just not talk quite so much?
00:38.730 --> 00:45.640
Youre tired, Sensei. Maybe you should sleep a little.
00:46.330 --> 00:54.660
Tired? I guess I look that way. Youre right. I must look that way.
00:55.110 --> 00:58.040
I feel bad for you Toko-san.
00:58.060 --> 01:01.370
You cant do your own research because youre busy with miscellaneous tasks.
01:01.370 --> 01:03.660
Im not doing any miscellaneous tasks!
01:04.750 --> 01:06.240
Im sorry.
01:06.680 --> 01:09.370
Im sorry for raising my voice like that.
01:09.530 --> 01:11.060
You must be shocked.
01:11.060 --> 01:14.060
Did something happen? Toko-san?
01:14.060 --> 01:15.460
No, nothing.
01:15.460 --> 01:19.480
Youre busy with miscellaneous tasks and cant do your own research. Does that bother you?
01:19.480 --> 01:20.930
How do you know about... ?
01:20.930 --> 01:22.970
I found the homepage for this research center.
01:23.000 --> 01:29.130
I saw the list of researchers and published dissertations, but I couldn't find you.
01:29.130 --> 01:34.510
Thats right. I havent published any dissertations since I came here. But I mean to very soon.
01:34.510 --> 01:38.600
Youre OK now. You have time for your own research now?
01:38.600 --> 01:41.530
What are you saying? What do you mean, Lain?
01:42.040 --> 01:45.220
Im not a research subject, am I?
01:45.220 --> 01:47.620
Thats why Im not useful to you.
01:48.170 --> 01:50.820
We can end now if youd like.
01:51.200 --> 01:52.820
I cant see them anymore.
01:53.240 --> 01:56.620
Im wasting your time.
01:57.860 --> 01:58.860
Lain.
01:59.660 --> 02:04.130
Youre like a sister to me.
02:04.130 --> 02:06.910
Im the one who said that we could just talk.
02:06.910 --> 02:09.080
I dont think of you as a nuisance.
02:09.080 --> 02:09.750
And...
02:09.750 --> 02:15.550
Theres nothing for you to worry about, Toko-san. It was a suicide.
02:15.550 --> 02:17.550
How do you know about that?
02:17.550 --> 02:22.130
I read it in the paper. It was on the bulletin board here, too.
02:22.600 --> 02:25.910
I see. Youre right.
02:26.200 --> 02:28.600
What kind of research do you do?
02:30.150 --> 02:38.770
As I said before, Im trying to develop a new treatment system using my background as a counselor and psychiatrist.
02:39.550 --> 02:42.970
But it looks like Im failing as a counselor and a psychiatrist right now.
02:43.180 --> 02:44.350
Why?
02:45.020 --> 02:52.080
I think Im becoming mentally unstable, now. Just a few moments ago, I...Im sorry.
02:52.420 --> 02:55.600
Toko-san... are you ok?

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WEBVTT
00:00.600 --> 00:01.930
Toko-san.
00:02.350 --> 00:03.710
Good morning.
00:04.240 --> 00:05.370
Im sorry.
00:05.860 --> 00:09.420
I stayed up all night preparing my paper.
00:09.420 --> 00:11.350
Everything is scattered everywhere.
00:11.350 --> 00:12.910
Could you give me a second?
00:12.910 --> 00:15.750
Maybe I should go home?
00:15.750 --> 00:21.350
Its all right. Dont worry. Oh, shoot, Im out of tea.
00:21.350 --> 00:24.310
I can go buy you some.
00:24.310 --> 00:25.440
Thanks.
00:25.800 --> 00:27.550
I appreciate your feelings.
00:28.080 --> 00:29.530
Have a seat, Lain.
00:29.530 --> 00:32.750
I thought that maybe I ought to take a break, too.
00:32.750 --> 00:34.000
Are you very busy?
00:34.000 --> 00:35.750
A little.
00:36.220 --> 00:39.080
After that thing happened to Professor Takashima.
00:39.080 --> 00:41.640
Now I have to do a lot of his work, too.
00:41.640 --> 00:44.770
Ive had a lot of new clients, to boot.
00:44.770 --> 00:46.110
Can you do your research?
00:46.110 --> 00:49.310
Lain, dont mind that stuff too much.
00:49.770 --> 00:54.750
Itll be tough for a while, but I have things to do.
00:55.350 --> 00:59.570
For now, Im just happy just concentrating on my work.
00:59.570 --> 01:01.040
You arent sad?
01:01.040 --> 01:07.620
Youll understand one day Lain. Its a wonderful thing to have work thats fulfilling.
01:07.620 --> 01:13.000
I dont think I would understand. Instead of something like that...
01:13.000 --> 01:19.110
Instead of... what do you mean? Did you do something fun lately?
01:19.110 --> 01:22.460
Yes. I think everything is going to work out well.
01:22.880 --> 01:24.280
What will work out well?
01:24.280 --> 01:25.750
Things about me.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:04.000
Lain, Id like to confirm something with you.
00:04.000 --> 00:08.800
What were the names of your friends that you talked about?
00:08.800 --> 00:10.120
Kyoko-chan.
00:10.120 --> 00:14.080
I see. And you have another friend?
00:14.080 --> 00:15.280
Misato-chan?
00:15.280 --> 00:18.600
Right. Misato-chan.
00:18.600 --> 00:20.900
Why do you ask?
00:20.900 --> 00:23.170
Never mind.
00:23.170 --> 00:27.270
I was just gathering information for a report, and part of it asks about friends you may have.
00:27.300 --> 00:33.000
I was double-checking it because I was a bit unsure of myself.
00:33.000 --> 00:36.670
Oh. Misato-chan. Is she going to be in your charts, too?
00:36.670 --> 00:43.770
No, just her name. Nothing else. Does she live in your neighborhood?
00:44.220 --> 00:48.420
Yes. But I cant walk there.
00:48.420 --> 00:51.020
You have to go by car?
00:51.020 --> 00:57.350
Yes. When I go to Misato-chans home, I always have my mom or dad drive me there.
00:57.770 --> 00:59.900
What does your dad do?
00:59.900 --> 01:04.770
He goes to work. Hes not around home much.
01:04.770 --> 01:08.950
Hes very busy, then. Is he nice to you?
01:08.950 --> 01:13.400
He is. He brings me gifts when he goes to work.
01:13.870 --> 01:16.000
Thats great, Lain.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:04.070
Lain, Id like for you to tell me the truth.
00:04.070 --> 00:05.450
The truth?
00:05.450 --> 00:09.050
You dont have any friend named Misato-chan, do you?
00:09.050 --> 00:12.620
Ha, ha. What do you mean? Thats silly of you.
00:12.620 --> 00:14.070
I asked Kyoko-chan.
00:14.070 --> 00:14.770
And?
00:14.770 --> 00:19.570
She said that there is no Misato-chan. She said, "isnt that Minakos mistake?"
00:19.570 --> 00:22.100
Is that what you believe?
00:22.100 --> 00:26.400
Im not accusing you, but this is very important.
00:26.400 --> 00:28.170
For you to write your report?
00:28.170 --> 00:32.800
I wont deny that. But Im concerned about you personally.
00:32.800 --> 00:34.550
About me personally?
00:34.550 --> 00:35.500
Yes.
00:35.500 --> 00:39.800
Im concerned that you might be creating imaginary friends and running away into your own little world.
00:39.800 --> 00:41.250
That is a sickness.
00:41.250 --> 00:46.900
You said that kids often have that, and that theres nothing wrong with it, Toko-san.
00:46.900 --> 00:50.670
Misato-chan isn't an imaginary friend, either.
00:50.670 --> 00:56.320
Then where is she? Can you call her right now? Can you give her a call right now, in front of me?
00:56.320 --> 00:59.970
She cant be contacted. She moved away.
00:59.970 --> 01:02.550
Can you do anything to prove to me that she exists?
01:02.550 --> 01:04.550
That she exists?
01:04.550 --> 01:06.820
Yes. Can you prove that?
01:06.820 --> 01:08.250
My memory...
01:08.250 --> 01:14.370
Look, Lain, I want to believe you, but I cant read your mind or tell what your memories are.

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@ -0,0 +1,91 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:02.200
Its not a memory. Its a record.
00:02.900 --> 00:10.520
Well, theyre vaguely similar. But its no time to be playing word-games.
00:11.070 --> 00:13.650
You would understand if you were connected.
00:13.650 --> 00:15.900
Connected to what?
00:15.900 --> 00:22.900
Lain, you say that Misato-chan exists, but you are the only person who says so.
00:22.900 --> 00:25.650
How can you expect anyone else to understand?
00:25.650 --> 00:28.150
There is something wrong with this.
00:28.150 --> 00:29.520
How can anyone believe you?
00:29.520 --> 00:30.670
You don't believe me, Toko-san?
00:30.670 --> 00:33.500
Unfortunately, no.
00:33.950 --> 00:38.920
But thats because Ive looked very closely into this personally, and all the facts point against it.
00:38.920 --> 00:44.170
If you could show me some objective proof that that I am mistaken, that would be different.
00:44.520 --> 00:48.020
How would I prove that she exists?
00:48.020 --> 00:49.350
How?
00:49.350 --> 00:52.700
Well show me other people whove known her.
00:52.700 --> 00:55.370
Show me her identification or birth certificate or something.
00:55.370 --> 00:58.970
More than anything else, show me that shes a human being that exists and walks around in a human body.
00:58.970 --> 01:01.380
She doesnt exist if she doesnt have a human body?
01:01.380 --> 01:04.150
Of course not! Shes not a ghost, is she?
01:04.150 --> 01:07.710
Professor Takashima didnt exist, then?
01:08.310 --> 01:10.550
But he did exist.
01:10.550 --> 01:12.300
He had a body before he died.
01:12.300 --> 01:13.900
He lived and walked around in a human body.
01:13.900 --> 01:15.490
There is ample evidence that he existed.
01:15.500 --> 01:17.940
Many people who are alive now knew him.
01:18.380 --> 01:20.480
There are records of his existence.
01:20.920 --> 01:22.730
Lets cool it, Lain.
01:22.730 --> 01:26.000
Im not here to have a question and answer session with you.
01:26.370 --> 01:28.160
Im here to treat you.
01:28.600 --> 01:31.720
I do not acknowledge Misato-chans existence.

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WEBVTT
00:01.160 --> 00:08.250
Im sorry about last session, Lain. I dont know myself why I became so angry.
00:08.250 --> 00:09.850
Its ok, Toko-san.
00:09.850 --> 00:13.810
Its just that aside from this issue with Misato-chan, I cant see anything wrong with you.
00:14.340 --> 00:16.700
Well have to work on it slowly.
00:16.700 --> 00:18.650
Will you finish your paper in time?
00:18.650 --> 00:21.290
Im not putting anything about you in my paper.
00:21.290 --> 00:23.450
Ill use information from other clients.
00:23.820 --> 00:27.330
Its not your problem anyway, Lain.
00:28.760 --> 00:30.360
Youre gentle, Lain.
00:30.610 --> 00:32.040
Im not gentle.
00:32.570 --> 00:34.570
I have to apologize.
00:35.140 --> 00:40.420
I should have apologized right away, but Ive done some things behind your back.
00:40.930 --> 00:44.660
I lied and told some of your friends that Im a private tutor.
00:44.660 --> 00:46.440
I asked your friends about you.
00:47.140 --> 00:49.250
I needed the information for my report.
00:49.250 --> 00:55.730
I should have these things with more benevolent intentions, but... are you angry?
00:56.460 --> 00:57.620
Im sorry, Lain.
00:57.620 --> 01:00.770
But I did it for y... No, I didnt do it for you.
01:01.400 --> 01:03.650
I did it for my work.

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@ -0,0 +1,31 @@
WEBVTT
00:01.500 --> 00:03.690
Who did you see, Toko-san?
00:04.720 --> 00:07.200
Kyoko-chan and Kaori-chan.
00:07.940 --> 00:12.810
I know Kyoko-chan, but who is Kaori-chan?
00:14.040 --> 00:16.420
Shes your classmate.
00:17.080 --> 00:20.400
You arent going to ask me to prove her existence now, are you?
00:20.400 --> 00:21.660
Ill feel bad.
00:21.660 --> 00:23.660
Please dont be hard on me that way, Lain.
00:24.060 --> 00:26.330
Youre confident, Toko-san.
00:27.090 --> 00:28.160
About what?
00:28.640 --> 00:32.320
Youre confident that that person exists. I cant prove that she exists.

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@ -0,0 +1,118 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.440 --> 00:02.820
You seem to be busy lately, Toko-san.
00:03.450 --> 00:04.210
Yes.
00:04.210 --> 00:09.360
The deadline for my paper is coming up, and although Ive been waiting for a long time for someone to relieve me with some of my work, it hasnt happened.
00:09.360 --> 00:11.260
That means more work for me.
00:11.260 --> 00:12.730
Sure, its a little hard.
00:12.730 --> 00:13.900
Is it tiresome?
00:14.330 --> 00:18.000
Im ok, Lain. You dont have to worry about it.
00:18.420 --> 00:20.160
Im worried about you, Toko-san.
00:20.600 --> 00:26.300
About me? Well thank you. I appreciate your feelings.
00:26.640 --> 00:30.080
Will you continue to like me, Toko-san?
00:30.740 --> 00:37.890
Of course! Youre my little sister, remember? I dont have any reasons not to like you.
00:38.210 --> 00:41.130
But I made you mad.
00:42.890 --> 00:44.060
Thats true.
00:44.060 --> 00:51.810
But that was just because youre growing intellectually, we were having a discussion and we had a difference of opinion.
00:51.810 --> 00:53.380
But lets leave that alone.
00:53.800 --> 00:57.040
Theres no reason for me to dislike you because we had a difference of opinion.
00:57.040 --> 01:00.640
Do you have important people in your life aside from me?
01:01.320 --> 01:02.340
Sure.
01:02.620 --> 01:05.420
I have friends, too.
01:05.420 --> 01:09.340
You have people in your life that are important to you aside from me, dont you?
01:09.980 --> 01:18.780
I do. But if I had to choose one person, I would choose you.
01:19.700 --> 01:23.840
That makes me happy. Then, Ill pick you, too.
01:23.840 --> 01:29.890
Really? But is that ok? What about the other important people in your life?
01:29.890 --> 01:38.460
If you chose me and I didnt choose you, wont you feel sad? I dont want you to feel sad.
01:38.460 --> 01:41.130
Wont your lover be sad?
01:43.820 --> 01:53.320
Huh? Um, well, yes. Are you interested in my private life, Lain?
01:54.050 --> 01:55.890
I want to know about you.
01:56.450 --> 02:01.800
Things having to do about my lover are a secret. Youre a bit young for that kind of thing, anyway.
02:01.800 --> 02:03.380
Too young?
02:03.880 --> 02:09.880
You may eventually have a love life of your own. But love is a pretty complicated thing.
02:09.880 --> 02:11.050
Complicated?
02:11.480 --> 02:11.860
Yes.
02:11.860 --> 02:13.660
I have by doubts and worries about it, too.
02:13.660 --> 02:15.230
Im human.
02:15.230 --> 02:18.160
I make mistakes and have regrets.
02:18.160 --> 02:20.840
Even now I have feelings that I cant figure out.
02:21.370 --> 02:22.190
See?
02:22.190 --> 02:23.210
Its complicated.
02:23.890 --> 02:25.210
Complicated...

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WEBVTT
00:00.460 --> 00:03.060
Youre Lain, arent you?
00:03.610 --> 00:06.810
Sure I am. Youre being silly, Toko-san.
00:07.080 --> 00:07.730
Oh, Im sorry.
00:07.730 --> 00:08.540
Youre right.
00:09.120 --> 00:11.660
Im a little tired.
00:12.240 --> 00:14.180
Im sorry for asking goofy questions.
00:15.140 --> 00:17.970
You seem to be really doing well lately, Lain.
00:17.970 --> 00:20.050
I havent changed.
00:20.940 --> 00:24.730
Weve been having counseling sessions for a long time.
00:25.160 --> 00:30.980
A long time? Do you mean many times? Have I been seeing you too much?
00:33.550 --> 00:37.940
Maybe. What do you think?
00:38.580 --> 00:41.050
There seem to be many areas left.
00:41.400 --> 00:45.730
What do you mean? Don't tell me things I cant understand.
00:45.730 --> 00:51.210
Whats wrong? Are you angry? You cant control your emotions?
00:51.210 --> 00:56.300
Why are you asking me this! Look, Lain. Are you playing with me? Are you mocking me?
00:56.300 --> 00:57.240
No.
00:57.240 --> 01:01.950
This counseling session is for YOU. You come here to see me. Not the other way around.
01:01.950 --> 01:07.330
But you said that I could talk. I want to know about you.
01:07.330 --> 01:12.300
How is finding out about me going to help you? Do you just want to irritate me?
01:12.740 --> 01:14.660
You really didnt like my questions?
01:14.660 --> 01:15.420
No, I didnt!
01:15.420 --> 01:17.310
I want you to leave things alone.
01:17.310 --> 01:19.610
I dont want you trying to get inside my head.
01:20.180 --> 01:21.200
Thats what I think.
01:21.780 --> 01:23.650
Arent you sad to be alone?
01:23.650 --> 01:24.820
Im not alone!
01:24.820 --> 01:26.380
I am not you!
01:26.380 --> 01:28.250
You are Lain, arent you?
01:29.290 --> 01:34.800
Youre the proper, reserved, sad girl without much self-confidence, arent you?
01:34.800 --> 01:40.370
No, thats not me. I think my personality is much different from that.
01:40.370 --> 01:41.480
Then who are you?
01:41.740 --> 01:43.920
Im... Lain.

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@ -0,0 +1,85 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.680 --> 00:03.500
I felt really good today.
00:04.020 --> 00:06.820
Thats really great, Toko-san.
00:07.310 --> 00:14.560
Im starting to feel worse, though. I cant tell whats bothering me.
00:15.070 --> 00:18.890
Is it something vague? Something about feeling dormant?
00:19.680 --> 00:24.890
When youre feeling happy, dont you sometimes feel worried about when it might come to an end?
00:25.330 --> 00:29.720
Is that a symptom of an intermittent flow of thought?
00:30.520 --> 00:33.470
I cant imagine myself being happy.
00:33.470 --> 00:35.530
You can imagine yourself being unhappy?
00:36.610 --> 00:40.430
I suppose. But I cant get rid of the worry.
00:40.830 --> 00:42.730
Is there something I can do?
00:42.730 --> 00:47.770
What would I want to seek for from you? Why me from you?
00:47.770 --> 00:49.260
Are you too proud to tell me?
00:49.260 --> 00:54.890
It has nothing to do with pride. Why dont you tell me what you think is going on with me.
00:54.890 --> 00:57.120
Youre just Toko-san. Youre yourself.
00:57.120 --> 01:07.200
Thats right. I better get to my reports. If you want, you can stay around here, but I have to go.
01:07.630 --> 01:08.480
Why?
01:08.480 --> 01:10.180
Because there is something I have to do right now.
01:10.180 --> 01:11.540
There is something that I can only do now.
01:11.540 --> 01:13.600
I have to continue my research.
01:13.600 --> 01:15.230
That makes you happy?
01:15.230 --> 01:19.290
Yes, it does. My number one goal is to continue doing the research that I enjoy.
01:19.610 --> 01:21.260
So thats number one?
01:21.260 --> 01:22.000
No.
01:22.000 --> 01:23.150
Thats not what I mean.
01:23.610 --> 01:26.250
Seeing you is very important, too.
01:23.610 --> 01:29.470
Its very important to me that everything goes well.
01:29.470 --> 01:31.880
But I have to do things in order.
01:32.170 --> 01:33.390
Im glad.

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WEBVTT
00:00.410 --> 00:02.160
Are you troubled about anything?
00:02.160 --> 00:05.070
No, Im not. How about you, Toko-san?
00:05.440 --> 00:09.610
Sometimes. I feel like something bad might happen.
00:09.610 --> 00:11.200
Youre feeling delusional?
00:11.200 --> 00:16.200
Yes, but unlike with you, it isnt a strange delusional problem with perception.
00:16.200 --> 00:17.740
I wonder if thats true.
00:17.740 --> 00:22.410
But how about the feelings you have about that man?
00:22.410 --> 00:23.630
Arent those feelings delusional?
00:23.630 --> 00:25.720
Who is "that man"?
00:25.720 --> 00:28.350
The man youre thinking about right now.
00:29.680 --> 00:32.540
You can tell what Im thinking.
00:32.540 --> 00:33.740
Wow!
00:33.740 --> 00:35.640
You have super powers?
00:35.640 --> 00:38.520
Is that why you poke fun at me sometimes?
00:38.520 --> 00:41.850
But Im connected to you, Toko-san.
00:41.850 --> 00:44.620
"Connected"? In what way?
00:44.620 --> 00:47.770
It probably wouldnt make sense if I tried to explain it to you.
00:47.770 --> 00:50.640
Thats called psychosis, Lain.
00:50.640 --> 00:55.800
Believing yourself to be a unique "chosen" person or that you are God.
00:55.800 --> 00:57.150
Thats a serious disease.
00:57.150 --> 01:00.570
Im sick. How about you?
01:00.570 --> 01:03.720
Im not sick. Im...

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@ -0,0 +1,67 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.120 --> 00:02.750
You dont have much energy.
00:03.480 --> 00:05.130
Im tired.
00:05.130 --> 00:07.310
Are you tired of doing miscellaneous chores?
00:07.310 --> 00:11.050
Is someone having you do waste your time with small tasks?
00:11.050 --> 00:14.750
Yeah. I do feel that way sometimes.
00:14.750 --> 00:19.130
Do you think you have some kind of psychological condition?
00:19.130 --> 00:21.930
Do you think you might have caught something from me?
00:21.930 --> 00:23.200
Ha, ha.
00:23.200 --> 00:29.950
Why do you think Im like this? I know and understand the things I am talking about.
00:29.950 --> 00:35.720
Youre ok, Toko-san. Youll be better by tomorrow.
00:35.720 --> 00:37.420
Ill be "better"?
00:37.420 --> 00:39.770
Youll be in a world where you dont suffer.
00:40.490 --> 00:45.790
Am I myself when I am by myself or when Im with you?
00:45.790 --> 00:50.250
Youre always yourself. Even when you doubt my existence.
00:50.250 --> 00:52.590
I doubt your existence?
00:52.590 --> 00:55.470
Yes. You dont want to believe that I exist.
00:55.470 --> 00:58.960
Why would I have a problem like that because I treat you?
00:58.960 --> 01:04.780
There is information you wouldnt understand now. You arent doing well psychologically.
01:05.290 --> 01:10.510
"Information I wouldnt understand now?" But I want to know now.
01:10.510 --> 01:15.320
Yes. But it would be too difficult for you to understand now.
01:16.170 --> 01:20.830
Youre thinking about whats best for me, arent you, Lain?
01:20.830 --> 01:25.710
Of course, I am. I like you.

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@ -0,0 +1,85 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:01.080
A rumor?
00:01.550 --> 00:02.800
Does it bother you?
00:03.600 --> 00:05.950
Someone is spreading rumors about you?
00:06.300 --> 00:07.850
Is that a delusion of persecution?
00:07.850 --> 00:09.960
Some other kind of delusion?
00:10.490 --> 00:14.840
Well, it might just be a lack of self-confidence.
00:16.360 --> 00:20.750
Why do you have so much confidence, even when youre sick, Lain?
00:20.750 --> 00:32.040
Im sick. Whats the name of my disease? Schizophrenia? Manic depression? Something else?
00:32.860 --> 00:42.060
You arent any of those things.
00:42.060 --> 00:44.410
You have pathomimesis.
00:44.410 --> 00:46.800
Thats what you call the imitation of disease.
00:46.800 --> 00:49.120
Then Im not really sick?
00:49.120 --> 00:53.680
You dont exist.
00:53.680 --> 00:56.190
I just think that youre here.
00:56.190 --> 00:57.620
Everyone has been tricked.
00:57.620 --> 00:59.280
Weve all been shown some glimpse of your existence.
00:59.280 --> 01:03.680
Thats why no one really remembers you.
01:03.680 --> 01:13.000
Its not like you to be mad. Some of us dont seem to exist, though. Which are you?
01:13.530 --> 01:16.160
I think that you think Im here.
01:16.160 --> 01:18.560
Youre a delusion that created a delusion.
01:18.560 --> 01:24.400
All these things, your constructed diseases and your voices, are delusions.
01:24.400 --> 01:26.780
How about me? Am I here?
01:26.780 --> 01:30.360
Thats why I have to heal you!
01:30.360 --> 01:35.400
Youre so serious. But youre an elite. Youve been chosen.
01:35.400 --> 01:36.110
Thats right.
01:36.110 --> 01:38.440
Im trying hard to be here.
01:38.440 --> 01:45.640
I would rather have been out playing and fooling around, but Ive gone to school and studied and worked hard to get here.
01:45.640 --> 01:47.640
I feel sorry for you, Toko-san.

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WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:02.240
Are you ok, Toko-san.
00:03.070 --> 00:09.200
Yes. Im hanging in there. Sometimes I dont feel so good.
00:09.690 --> 00:14.280
You think too much, Toko-san. You pay too much attention to whats going on around you.
00:15.100 --> 00:19.900
I have things to think about. Work. Romance.
00:19.900 --> 00:21.950
Is a love life necessary?
00:22.570 --> 00:26.320
I think its a very important part of life.
00:26.320 --> 00:29.260
Does a woman need a man?
00:29.710 --> 00:36.060
Not just because shes a woman. If that were true, a man would need a woman.
00:36.060 --> 00:44.080
It would be obsessive to think that a woman must have a man, Toko-san. You can live on your own.
00:44.780 --> 00:55.160
But wouldnt that be sad? I cant stand to be sad. How about you? How about you, Lain?
00:55.710 --> 00:58.140
I would get sad, too.

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@ -0,0 +1,79 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.500 --> 00:03.460
You dont want to do anything? How about your research?
00:03.460 --> 00:06.480
No one will want to read my paper anyway.
00:06.480 --> 00:10.680
Whats wrong? Its not like you to play a victim.
00:10.680 --> 00:13.500
Not like me! What am I?
00:13.840 --> 00:15.440
Youre just Toko-san, Toko-san.
00:15.440 --> 00:19.320
Ive been severed from society. Im no longer connected.
00:19.320 --> 00:28.000
Thats not true. Im connected to you. Im connected to society. Thats why youre connected, too.
00:28.000 --> 00:29.810
Somethings wrong with me, isnt there?
00:29.810 --> 00:33.640
The times when I talk to you and the time I spend with everything else are separate.
00:33.640 --> 00:37.490
From your point of view, my life must be a contradiction.
00:38.060 --> 00:40.120
My point of view?
00:40.120 --> 00:43.720
From your point of view, this world doesnt exist.
00:43.720 --> 00:48.640
No. Thats not true. Im connected to this world.
00:48.640 --> 00:50.550
I cant take it anymore.
00:50.550 --> 00:53.360
I cant even stand this moment.
00:53.360 --> 00:55.780
Thats not all.
00:55.780 --> 00:59.030
My memories of tomorrow...the memories Ill have in the future are in disarray.
00:59.030 --> 01:00.750
Is this a delusion caused by worrying?
01:00.750 --> 01:03.740
Am I experiencing something I shouldnt be experiencing?
01:03.740 --> 01:05.260
Thats you, isnt it?
01:05.260 --> 01:08.080
It is me! Because it is me!
01:08.080 --> 01:11.020
Wouldnt you be better off if you were just being yourself?
01:11.020 --> 01:15.140
I cant understand my sense of self from moment to moment!
01:15.140 --> 01:18.800
The judgment you have exactly at that moment is you, Toko-san. The rest is...
01:18.800 --> 01:19.780
The rest is...
01:19.780 --> 01:21.260
Ordinary data.

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WEBVTT
00:05.480 --> 00:09.830
Lain! Why didn't you wait for us?!

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@ -0,0 +1,43 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.260 --> 00:02.830
You said we could visit you after school.
00:02.930 --> 00:03.850
Really?
00:03.850 --> 00:05.960
Listen, Lain!
00:06.140 --> 00:08.260
You play games all the time.
00:09.110 --> 00:14.180
You never listen during classes... and then you get 100% on tests.
00:14.500 --> 00:15.570
It's not relevant.
00:15.860 --> 00:17.620
It is! It is!
00:17.820 --> 00:20.450
Lain, your dad is cool, isn't he?
00:20.940 --> 00:21.650
Will we see him today?
00:21.980 --> 00:23.030
I'm sorry.
00:23.220 --> 00:24.200
I really can't today.
00:24.680 --> 00:25.630
Sorry.
00:30.020 --> 00:32.020
I'm sure she's free...
00:32.250 --> 00:33.700
Yeah...

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@ -0,0 +1,28 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.000 --> 00:01.240
"LAIN"
00:01.240 --> 00:03.560
That's what I don't get.
00:03.560 --> 00:09.400
If we use packet filtering here... then debugging won't be necessary.
00:13.120 --> 00:14.540
No, not that...
00:14.540 --> 00:15.740
I wanted...
00:17.160 --> 00:19.320
Don't enter without permission!
00:21.820 --> 00:23.040
My friend is with me.
00:23.300 --> 00:24.680
We are always together.
00:25.920 --> 00:27.160
All right.

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@ -0,0 +1,10 @@
WEBVTT
00:27.500 --> 00:30.740
By the way, I recently found a super tasty cake!
00:30.740 --> 00:32.580
Really? I love chocolate.
00:32.580 --> 00:34.560
Believe me, it's really good.

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@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
WEBVTT
00:01.970 --> 00:02.870
Computer?
00:03.290 --> 00:04.120
A friend?
00:06.740 --> 00:08.960
I never thought about it that way.
00:09.220 --> 00:11.310
We were talking about it before.

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@ -0,0 +1,25 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.320 --> 00:01.200
What's that?
00:01.360 --> 00:01.990
This?
00:02.690 --> 00:03.460
Bike-chan.
00:03.930 --> 00:04.740
A puppy.
00:05.060 --> 00:05.980
My stuffed toy.
00:08.310 --> 00:14.240
I wouldn't call him a friend, but...
00:14.880 --> 00:18.470
He was already there when I was born.
00:19.430 --> 00:20.850
Right, Bike-chan?

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@ -0,0 +1,16 @@
WEBVTT
00:08.850 --> 00:12.530
I wouldn't say I like meetings with Touko-sensei...
00:12.530 --> 00:14.450
Sure, it's nice.
00:16.280 --> 00:18.830
But I dislike it here.
00:19.080 --> 00:20.750
Why is that?
00:23.850 --> 00:25.450
I just do.

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@ -0,0 +1,4 @@
WEBVTT
00:03.420 --> 00:05.740
I'm going back to you.

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@ -0,0 +1,16 @@
WEBVTT
00:01.310 --> 00:01.970
... and so...
00:01.970 --> 00:03.850
...when we want to increase the processing speed
00:03.850 --> 00:06.080
...we must take into account the fact that the processor can overheat.
00:06.510 --> 00:09.790
You can keep the CPU cool by using a Peltier element...
00:10.160 --> 00:12.790
but it's still a problem...

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@ -0,0 +1,43 @@
WEBVTT
00:00.390 --> 00:01.780
Savant syndrome?
00:02.160 --> 00:03.560
Am I sick?
00:03.560 --> 00:06.420
I didn't say it's about you, Lain.
00:06.420 --> 00:09.310
Only that there are people who suffer from that sickness.
00:10.020 --> 00:11.620
If it's not about me...
00:11.620 --> 00:13.330
then why are talking about it?
00:13.860 --> 00:18.410
There are other children who may learn from your example.
00:20.010 --> 00:21.310
I'm only myself.
00:21.620 --> 00:23.000
Not other children.
00:25.010 --> 00:26.000
That's true!
00:26.910 --> 00:28.300
I'm sorry, Lain.
00:32.900 --> 00:34.130
What's wrong, Lain?
00:34.710 --> 00:36.510
Why are you calling me Lain?
00:39.780 --> 00:41.580
Who are you?

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@ -0,0 +1,10 @@
WEBVTT
00:13.350 --> 00:15.300
When we are not connected to the network...
00:16.140 --> 00:17.100
...we are all alone.
00:18.020 --> 00:19.000
Do you understand that?

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@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
WEBVTT
00:05.820 --> 00:06.810
Stop it!
00:07.100 --> 00:08.830
You have to be still!

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WEBVTT
00:06.010 --> 00:08.580
Dont do that. You have to stay calm...
00:19.930 --> 00:21.030
It finally came.
00:23.180 --> 00:28.580
Lain, concerning your inquiry, I think your approach is the correct one.
00:28.580 --> 00:39.600
The concept of a neural network is a relatively old idea, but the arrangement of neurons by any system may not necessarily make the system work...
00:41.270 --> 00:42.330
It wont work.
00:42.330 --> 00:45.330
Ha, ha.

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WEBVTT
00:00.970 --> 00:11.080
But even if it is assumed to be complete, there will definitely be an unknown network that connects people.
00:11.530 --> 00:17.530
It might be one of many things, like Jungs ideas of the subconscious.
00:18.570 --> 00:24.200
There are many ways to say it, but no one can prove its existence now...
00:27.570 --> 00:34.170
But thinking about a person like you who has an interest in this sort of thing, I wonder, what are you trying to research?
00:34.170 --> 00:35.710
What is your goal?

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WEBVTT
00:30.170 --> 00:32.220
Wave interference.

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WEBVTT
00:02.130 --> 00:05.020
I don't believe it's you.
00:05.020 --> 00:06.770
How old are you?
00:06.770 --> 00:08.020
Oh, I'm sorry.
00:08.020 --> 00:09.710
You shouldn't ask women about their age.
00:10.710 --> 00:14.280
I don't normally get a chance to talk with girls your age.
00:14.280 --> 00:16.440
And to be honest, it's making me a bit nervous.
00:17.530 --> 00:18.880
Do you have what you promised?
00:20.080 --> 00:22.000
The actuator motor.
00:28.040 --> 00:30.000
It's a rare thing.
00:30.000 --> 00:32.440
Watch out for electricity.
00:33.000 --> 00:34.060
No worries.
00:34.060 --> 00:35.170
So sure?
00:35.620 --> 00:39.420
What are you building anyway?
00:40.260 --> 00:41.220
Myself.
00:41.220 --> 00:44.150
And something that gave me a body.
00:46.370 --> 00:49.440
But it's only temporary.
00:50.020 --> 00:51.860
So there's no point in developing it.
00:53.660 --> 00:56.000
I don't think I quite understand...
00:56.440 --> 00:59.480
Things are born when you build them.
01:00.640 --> 01:04.930
And when they are destroyed, they transform into something else.
01:05.130 --> 01:08.260
Something completely new.
01:23.640 --> 01:25.570
Do you know what's going on?

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WEBVTT
00:08.330 --> 00:09.150
Stop!

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WEBVTT
00:03.820 --> 00:04.680
Lain?
00:09.060 --> 00:09.950
Lain!

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WEBVTT
00:12.480 --> 00:14.800
What's going on?

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WEBVTT
00:12.440 --> 00:13.570
Lain!
00:18.220 --> 00:22.060
When you appeared in a laboratory two years ago...
00:22.440 --> 00:25.840
...all data about you was entered into a database.
00:26.280 --> 00:27.550
You know that.
00:31.000 --> 00:34.280
Archives of movies recorded by your family.
00:34.730 --> 00:37.460
The contents of your personal computer.
00:37.460 --> 00:38.750
We had it all in data.
00:39.110 --> 00:41.150
But there's something strange...
00:41.910 --> 00:44.730
The last data update...

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WEBVTT
00:01.500 --> 00:02.800
...is about your future!
00:03.340 --> 00:05.800
It's a record from a day two years in the future!
00:09.660 --> 00:12.260
Who are you?
00:15.900 --> 00:17.700
Talk to me!
00:22.400 --> 00:24.880
Why isn't there any data prior to three years ago...?
00:24.880 --> 00:25.780
No!
00:26.160 --> 00:29.300
You were born in your current form...
00:31.300 --> 00:35.420
It doesn't matter in this world.
00:36.000 --> 00:37.580
You know that.
00:37.580 --> 00:38.540
Stay away!
00:46.530 --> 00:50.500
I want to connect with the entire world.

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WEBVTT
00:14.680 --> 00:15.340
Lain.
00:17.600 --> 00:18.300
You...
00:18.800 --> 00:19.560
I finished.
00:19.920 --> 00:21.300
What are you talking about?
00:22.940 --> 00:24.300
About my dad.
00:25.360 --> 00:27.040
What?
00:29.320 --> 00:29.920
Lain!
00:34.100 --> 00:34.600
Lain!
00:40.500 --> 00:41.240
Lain?

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WEBVTT
00:14.170 --> 00:15.460
It's over.
00:17.020 --> 00:18.460
For me it's the beginning.
00:18.880 --> 00:21.440
From now on we will always be together.

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WEBVTT
00:00.740 --> 00:09.620
Concerning diagnosis: The client lives in a nuclear family with her mother and father.
00:09.620 --> 00:13.800
Both parents are middle to upper class and financially well-to-do.
00:14.860 --> 00:17.080
The parents have a stable relationship.
00:17.080 --> 00:20.560
They do not seem to have mental health problems.
00:21.500 --> 00:36.380
Concerning family history of illness, according to the parents as well as the database at our center, there was no neurosis, mental illness, suicidality or consanguineous marriage in her family.

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WEBVTT
00:01.160 --> 00:04.900
She hasnt had any significant problems from the time of birth.
00:05.160 --> 00:09.780
Even at this point, she doesnt have any bad habits or problems with truancy.
00:10.700 --> 00:16.020
She does not seem to have a troubled history.
00:16.380 --> 00:20.740
Of course, at this research center, accompanying illnesses must be treated.
00:22.620 --> 00:31.660
I wanted to ask her about her illness history when I started counseling her, but she was very shy.
00:31.660 --> 00:38.500
I decided that I would try to get her to open up.

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WEBVTT
00:01.100 --> 00:06.140
According to her mother at home, Lain has very frightening dreams.
00:06.680 --> 00:09.380
They are not ordinary dreams.
00:09.380 --> 00:13.400
They are very realistic and almost hallucinatory.
00:13.400 --> 00:16.180
She visited the hospital for this reason.
00:17.120 --> 00:26.980
Regarding the nature of the dreams, it seems that Lain doesn't elaborate much about their contents, but she says that she sometimes hears incomprehensible voices out of nowhere, that she is suddenly awakened and forced to watch a video.
00:26.980 --> 00:31.600
She sometimes plays in the park, and suddenly finds herself alone when she thought other kids were around.
00:31.600 --> 00:36.720
These seem to be childhood imaginary fears.
00:37.120 --> 00:42.420
In the future we will address these symptoms.
00:42.420 --> 00:44.480
I hope for a recovery.
00:44.480 --> 00:48.080
It might be possible.
00:49.040 --> 00:57.040
Fundamentally, even if that does not occur, she may be able to manage life at home.
00:57.040 --> 01:09.180
However, what her mother said that concerned me was her hallucinations.
01:10.560 --> 01:21.520
I will try to pinpoint the cause of these symptoms in our counseling sessions.

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WEBVTT
00:00.890 --> 00:07.340
The physical appearance of the client at the first session.
00:07.340 --> 00:10.580
Her figure is short and thin.
00:10.580 --> 00:15.120
The only feature that stood out was her hairstyle.
00:15.120 --> 00:19.540
She has grown out the tuft of her hair on just one side of her face and tied it in a bundle.
00:19.540 --> 00:24.240
I dont think its a popular style at school, but it seems to be her individual style.
00:25.080 --> 00:28.560
According to her mother, she enjoys having her hair that way.
00:28.560 --> 00:32.460
Understanding the reason for her hairstyle may guide me in understanding her.
00:32.460 --> 00:34.460
I will look into this in the future.
00:35.100 --> 00:37.540
She has a calm demeanor, and her skin is fair.
00:37.540 --> 00:39.780
There is otherwise nothing left to mention.

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WEBVTT
00:01.360 --> 00:08.440
Although her affect is flat, she appears like any other healthy child when she smiles.
00:08.440 --> 00:15.340
She sometimes gets tongue-tied, but not to the point where communication with her becomes impossible.
00:15.340 --> 00:17.340
She seems calm and reserved.
00:18.500 --> 00:23.600
She understands my questions without a problem, and is capable of answering them.
00:24.240 --> 00:34.300
She doesnt seem to have problems with her attention span, concentration, orientation, clarity of thought, and expression of emotions, but hinders when asked about her symptoms.

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WEBVTT
00:00.660 --> 00:04.900
At this stage, I thought it would be a bad idea to ask her about her symptoms in a teasing fashion.
00:04.900 --> 00:08.420
I was unable to find details concerning her symptoms.
00:08.420 --> 00:12.140
However, she generally seems to be a clever and relaxed girl.
00:13.560 --> 00:16.460
Her mother showed me a painting she did in school.
00:16.460 --> 00:19.980
It was very well painted, and showed a high level of artistic sensibility.
00:21.020 --> 00:25.500
However, I could not find any specific points that might assist it analyzing her psychologically.
00:26.520 --> 00:34.180
At this stage, she appears to be at a delusional state, but there seems be a very good chance that she is a normal child.
00:35.520 --> 00:39.860
One point from her physical examination struck me.
00:40.180 --> 00:42.120
Her vision is excellent.
00:42.120 --> 00:45.340
Her standard light reflex is lower than the standard range.
00:45.340 --> 00:51.420
However, I have not seen in her the type of dermatological or anemic problems that are common for her age.

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WEBVTT
00:00.820 --> 00:11.520
Clinical notices from last session: First, concerning this case, I want to treat her as a therapist as opposed to a psychiatrist.
00:12.140 --> 00:16.480
Therefore, I will treat Iwakura Lain as my client from now on.
00:17.260 --> 00:23.420
One of the reasons for this is that she is still 12 years old and is emotionally sensitive.
00:23.420 --> 00:27.460
I do not want to make her feel that she is sick.
00:28.300 --> 00:38.600
In fact, from the results of her last clinical visit, the extent of what she is troubled from is nightmares and psychological damage associated with it.
00:38.900 --> 00:46.300
Although during sessions with her, psychological discomfort can be detected, she is able to ask and answer questions without a problem.
00:47.240 --> 00:56.440
I see no reason to advocate objections to my conclusion that she is sick, but at this point, I would like to treat her as someone without a mental illness.
00:57.920 --> 01:06.700
One more thing: Because I am both a psychiatrist and a counselor, my job is selecting the best position possible for my patients.
01:07.740 --> 01:18.200
When counseling her in the future, if I detect symptoms of mental illness, I would have to treat her as a psychiatrist.
01:19.140 --> 01:24.620
Of course, theres a good chance that I myself will continue to treat her.
01:24.620 --> 01:29.440
In order to honor my research and keep it objective, I may want to ask a third party to continue to treat her clinically.
01:29.440 --> 01:34.400
In the meanwhile, I will continue to work with her in a research setting.
01:36.160 --> 01:44.460
This may be an exceptional situation at this research center, but I would like to proceed with it.

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WEBVTT
00:00.680 --> 00:04.520
The client is very cooperative and our sessions have been going smoothly.
00:05.000 --> 00:12.060
However, somewhere within her, she still is very cautious around me, and it is difficult to discuss her problems.
00:12.820 --> 00:17.880
We had some extra time, so I proposed that we play a simple game.
00:17.880 --> 00:21.940
She turned me down, and we went directly into our session.
00:23.500 --> 00:30.360
She takes much curiosity in me, an outside observer, but I think this has to do with her cautiousness around me.
00:31.300 --> 00:41.320
She plays with dolls at home, and seems to have a complex associated with them.
00:42.320 --> 00:48.480
She has few friends, and playing with dolls is her way of dealing with her loneliness.

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WEBVTT
00:01.020 --> 00:04.840
In the clients response, a good understanding of language could be found.
00:05.500 --> 00:08.060
However, this is not related to disease.
00:08.300 --> 00:12.400
It displays the clients strong ability to use language.
00:13.660 --> 00:23.160
The client differentiated physical activity from physical education, stating that the latter is an "undertaking." In school and group activities, the two can be compared quite conspicuously.
00:23.160 --> 00:30.800
The fact that she says she likes physical exercise but not physical education may have to do with her lack of self confidence.

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WEBVTT
00:01.280 --> 00:05.420
Matters for special mention: The clients tendencies disturb me.
00:05.860 --> 00:09.320
Her light reflexes were tested at the hospital.
00:09.320 --> 00:11.940
She may have Adies syndrome.
00:12.820 --> 00:24.380
Together with active auditory hallucinations and paranoia, she may have early onset general paralysis, although very unlikely.

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WEBVTT
00:00.880 --> 00:07.460
Making a hasty diagnosis is taboo, but thinking of the worst, I think I should obtain cerebrospinal fluids as soon as possible.
00:09.040 --> 00:11.500
May I have your permission, please?

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WEBVTT
00:00.700 --> 00:04.400
My diagnosis at the hospital is affecting my client.
00:04.860 --> 00:10.960
She was emotionally hurt when she found out that the Rorschachs test was in fact a tool used to examine her.
00:11.900 --> 00:17.060
This wasnt severe to the extent of a "mind-rape," but I did hurt her in our session today.
00:17.860 --> 00:24.000
This has made me realize that I must be discrete when bringing up the theme of disease.
00:25.740 --> 00:30.520
I explained to her my role as a counselor, and my hopes to be helpful to her, and regained some trust from her.
00:30.960 --> 00:37.800
I hope that in our future sessions, she will develop some goals of her own concerning counseling.

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WEBVTT
00:01.440 --> 00:04.300
She seems to be cautious about with mother.
00:04.300 --> 00:07.220
And as far as shes concerned, her hallucinations are real.
00:07.220 --> 00:18.980
She may be mistrustful of her mother because her mother does not accept that her hallucinations are real. At this point, I dont know if the hallucinations are due to some warped sense of perception, or if they are entirely imaginary.
00:18.980 --> 00:21.460
There are times when it is difficult to tell.
00:23.120 --> 00:33.640
Concerning the vision the client saw floating in mid-air, they were most likely imaginary, opposed to being shapes of monsters formed by the shadows on the walls and curtains at night, etc.
00:33.640 --> 00:38.340
Could it be that she has developed a system of sensing without perceiving?
00:39.840 --> 00:42.620
I would like permission to examine her cerebrospinal fluid.

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WEBVTT
00:01.080 --> 00:05.840
My client has found her own diagnosis and has been studying it on her own.
00:05.840 --> 00:09.980
She must have a considerable amount of fear concerning her illness.
00:09.980 --> 00:16.360
Having the label of mental illness pasted on you causes you to be stigmatized by society.
00:16.360 --> 00:18.040
She may need to deal with this.
00:18.800 --> 00:23.380
I am rethinking the how the mentally ill are viewed by society.
00:24.480 --> 00:35.220
In our last session, I tried to eliminate her concerns about feeling that she is mentally ill. As a result, I think I was able to secure some trust in our relationship.

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WEBVTT
00:00.760 --> 00:03.640
Mainly, we talked about auditory hallucinations.
00:04.120 --> 00:08.680
She believes that she hears voices from electric lines.
00:09.100 --> 00:14.000
She says that the voices she hears are not related to her.
00:15.040 --> 00:22.060
This could be categorized as a delusion of physical influences, but the symptoms didnt seem serious enough to be called full-blown delusions.
00:22.060 --> 00:30.380
Her being "able to hear from phone lines and electric lines" seemed instead to be childlike theories.
00:30.380 --> 00:35.540
Shes an intelligent and sensitive girl, and probably creates her own hallucinations.
00:36.360 --> 00:41.880
However, regarding the fact that she has hallucinations only during the day makes her very unusual.
00:43.200 --> 00:53.400
Although I dont think my client is lying, but she says that she very rarely hallucinates while she is talking to her friends.
00:54.500 --> 01:05.100
Most likely, references to time and place become fuzzy in her mind, and she is either confusing separate experiences, or she may have just been talking to her friends in her dreams.

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